Am I inconsiderate? Or they are too sensitive? You be the judge
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Thread: Am I inconsiderate? Or they are too sensitive? You be the judge

  1. #1
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    Unhappy Am I inconsiderate? Or they are too sensitive? You be the judge

    I am not sure whether this is the right place to to vent my case, if it is not please kindly delete this post. I need to seek forumers advise on this because I am a first time home owner, and I want to deal with this with as much humility as possible so that I do not offend my neighbor, I plan to live here for a very long time. Let me split my story into stages for easy reading:

    1. Renovation

    Prior to renovation, I have provided information related to all neighbors around the house. I told them its going to be noisy, dusty and dirty. I told my contractor to be careful not to step out of line, maintain cleanliness, no work after six, no loud banging and drilling during weekends. I've also told contractor to set up plastic sheet on the left and right to minimize dust to neighbor.

    One neighbor in particular (lets call them neighbor K) started to shout at me, saying its very dusty, when air blows to his/her house all their cloths got dirty because of dust flying to their house. I apologize profusely and asked contractor to setup more plastic sheet. But they continue to complain.

    Then neighbor K started to complain about the rubbish tip that is park outside our house to dispose industrial waste, other neighbor started to throw rubbish there, rotten vegetable, that causes smell. They say we should monitor the tip to ensure no neighbor throw there, but it is impossible because I have to work. How can I control what is being thrown there?

    2. 5 days after renovation

    Neighbor K complain about mosquitoes, they claimed that before we start renovation the drainage is not stuck, now it is partially stuck and there is sand. I apologies again and I try to clean the drainage the best I can with shovel and water jet, but I could only clean on my side because theirs are all covered up. Almost every time they catch a glimpse of me, they'll complain to me about the drainage being block. I look at it now and water can flow, but not dry as I suspect there is some sand stuck on their side.

    3. 10 days after renovation

    This neighbor complain to me again saying one of their roof started to leak, he immediately accuse my contractor of stealing their roof tiles. Neighbor K claims that water started pouring in causing rain water damaged his bed sheet, he asked for compensation for repairs. I told him it is not logical for the contractor to steal his roof tiles, we bought plenty and there are still a lot more that is not used, Plus it has been raining heavily since renovation stop for the past 10 days, why only now water started pouring in? He said he will ask expert to check for root cause then will feedback to me after. Till today there is no feedback about this.

    4. Present day

    Neighbor K complain that there is dog and cat pooping behind our kitchen, causes bad smell. When I went and check it is not there anymore, maybe the rain wash it away for me. I can buy spray and such to deter the animals, but I don't think I can do much about that.

    I tried to be as objective as possible when I wrote the above, my question to you is, am I a terrible a**ho** neighbor who is inconsiderate to their slice of heaven? Or they are mentally insane? What can I do about it?

  2. #2
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    Neighbour K from hell.... you give him too much face.... too much humility...

  3. #3
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    You got a pesky neighbour from hell. That's all. The next time he renovates his house you just return the favour.

    With this kind of attitude he should be staying in a villa and not a terrace house.
    " In the land of the blind the one-eyed-jack is king."

  4. #4
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    Most probably your future neighbor is a old unmarried lady,trying to create problems to you.As you mention you will stay there for a long time,maybe you should buy something for her/him to eat like "oh i got some food from my kampung"Try it ,it will work.

  5. #5
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    As long as you or your contractor work within your legal house boundary and you have given prior notice, you have done nothing wrong. If I were you, I will turn a deaf ear and if neighbour K complain again and if this persist, ask him or her to write in officially.

  6. #6
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    Jacksonlim,

    There are always heliish, agitated people in a community who like to get personal ..

    It is tough when you have such people as your neighbour...

  7. #7
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    He blames you for stray dogs and cats shitting behind your house? Tell him to go eat it.

    Bloody stray cats come in and shit on my lawn and outside the gate. I even have to scoop the stinking shit. I didn't go blaming my neighbors.
    " In the land of the blind the one-eyed-jack is king."

  8. #8
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    People who are vindictive and bent on proving themselves to be better are many Jacksonlim... it's their upbringing... maybe because they have been earning less than the wife all these years and have inferiority complex... so they become spoilt brats with people they think they can bully...

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by jacksonlim View Post

    I tried to be as objective as possible when I wrote the above, my question to you is, am I a terrible a**ho** neighbor who is inconsiderate to their slice of heaven? Or they are mentally insane? What can I do about it?
    I don't think you're terrible or inconsiderate. If you are, you wouldn't have bothered with their complaints in the first place. It is good to be nice to your neighbor since you're planning to stay here "for a very long time." However, there will be neighbors (from hell) who are bent on making our lives miserable. We can't please everyone. So we live within our conscience and be as good a neighbor as we can be without compromising our values.

    When I moved into my first house many years ago, my immediate neighbor was a friendly little old lady. I saw her make the transition from nice to lunatic. It's scary living next door to a lunatic, let me tell ya! You want to keep your distance.

  10. #10
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    Generally myself and wife follows the rule of, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"... We really trying hard to be nice, but it is getting more and more difficult for us to do so...

    At this point I don't think I can bring myself to buy them stuff as jan tomaswaki suggested, in fear that they might come to my head and poop again if I show anymore kindness... Maybe in the future.... maybe...

  11. #11
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    This type of hellish agitated neighbor can be very unpredictable..

    They can suddenly be very nice to you because they want you to listen to their stories and brag about their past and present.. OMG, you cannot imagine what they can brag practically anything and everything under the sun. Once I heard someone brag he has a nephew who know where the MH370 has crashed !!

    I also remember someone brag he knew the mover and shaker of those who are in the political power in Malaysia.. LOL.

    Just be yourself, Jackson.. and try your best to keep a distance from such agitated fella. There is law and order in this country even though this people think they carry be a big bully. Maybe install a CCTV just in case they go amok.


    p/s : It is time to leave the office. I better grab a banana muffin to fill the stomach first as it would be a long drive due to Friday evening rush hour..

  12. #12
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    '2. 5 days after renovation

    Neighbor K complain about mosquitoes, they claimed that before we start renovation the drainage is not stuck, now it is partially stuck and there is sand. I apologies again and I try to clean the drainage the best I can with shovel and water jet, but I could only clean on my side because theirs are all covered up. Almost every time they catch a glimpse of me, they'll complain to me about the drainage being block. I look at it now and water can flow, but not dry as I suspect there is some sand stuck on their .....'

    I think you should have done their side as we'll.

    Clearing you side only showed you do not care after all you started the problem

  13. #13
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    You may have one lousy neighbour but rest assure you have plenty of friends on the forum. Don't let the fellow make you think you've made a wrong decision moving here. You didn't.

    Cheers
    " In the land of the blind the one-eyed-jack is king."

  14. #14
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    Is there 2 threads inside here? Seems like there are lots of sniping around...anything we missed?

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Naka View Post
    '

    I think you should have done their side as we'll.

    Clearing you side only showed you do not care after all you started the problem
    I understand Naka, but I really can't as their side is totally seal off, I can't craw in because the hole too small.... Trust me I tried...

    Btw I've been to "Naka" at Kedah, it's a cozy village populated by majority Thai people... Not sure whether your name is a coincidence...

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