need recomendations, having 1st baby! [Archive]

wormi

14-08-2007, 05:11 PM

racheljansz

14-08-2007, 06:01 PM

Congrats and Best Wishes.

Girl, you are still a long way from buying items on no. 2, best you visit the gyne for professional advice as to keeping yourself and baby fit.
In the meantime, get comfy shoes and cloths for yourself.

daniella

14-08-2007, 10:00 PM

Congrats...

The best way to save on Milk powder is to Breast feed...

Good for Mum and best for baby...and save $$$ too.

wormi

14-08-2007, 10:10 PM

haha thanks everyone..
thought of breast feeding too, but i'm afraid i dont have enough time, need to work, sigh. doubting of giving my baby for someone to babysit, too many scary cases..

bought new shoes and maternity wear d.
need to calculate on the budget..

USJ27Resident

14-08-2007, 11:09 PM

1. if i were to visit dr.delaila, how much will i need 2 spend roughly per month?
2. wat do i need to buy to get ready for the baby? milk powder, diapers..
3. how much to expect for a delivery in GH and medical centres? wanna compare all those prices.

..... hope you guys can help!

FIRSTLY, CONGRATS...

Guys! We're all WANTED! .... for advice... :p

Me think the ladies shud step up and start advising here... we men only good at causing 'accidents' or 'equipment failures' :D ... kidding!!

As to Q1. - as in any doctors' visitation - it varies.. depends on who and where and what is included in the pre-natal checks. (ie. ultrasound scan/blood test/blood pressure/supplements etc etc)

Q2. - also varies, premium milk like Enfa and Pediasure can cost more than 60ringgit per 1.8kg tin... Dumex, Nespray like in the mid RM30+ for big cans.

Q3. Delivery charges... NOW this is something you should look carefully into.
Are you going to try for NORMAL delivery or (opting for) by CAESAREAN. Normal delivery can be cheaper but mind you, if complications occur... the bloody bill is gonna go thru the roof (not to mention the trauma & stress for both mom and dad to be!) This is a choice you both have to sit down and discuss...

Normal delivery (IF no complications) healing faster and other benefits... faster to be back on your feet, up and running...

(Complications) add, FORCEPS delivery, VACUUM delivery and finally CAESAREAN... add stitches everywhere and lengthy recovery time...

My wife and I almost lost our son in 2002 because of this :( because thinking of opting for natural delivery and saving the extra money for other things for the baby. Ended up paying in excess of 10K at Sunway Medical because of the complications and son's Neonatal ICU costs... :( :(

My humble 2 sens, speak with your doctor and trust him/her on your options to delivery methods. If he is confident that you can go normal, then go... if he thinks otherwise, you better not TRY anything else...

cheers.

wormi

14-08-2007, 11:38 PM

did talk to my gynae back in my hometown. he suggested me to have caesarean, or c-section as i'm asmathic. severely asthmatic. furthermore, i'm bleeding throughout my pregnancy, which stands a high chance that i might have a miscarriage, but me and my husband made up our minds to have this baby, that we'll later name him Jayden.

previously my first visiit to Taipan's clinic cost rm200, ultrasound, urine test and vitamins. was quite shocked with the bill. heard from my friends that it'll only cost around rm150++ with blood tests, pap smear test and so on.

haha, thought that "you guys" would be everyone who is reading this thread?
thanks!

USJ27Resident

14-08-2007, 11:54 PM

previously my first visiit to Taipan's clinic cost rm200, ultrasound, urine test and vitamins. was quite shocked with the bill. heard from my friends that it'll only cost around rm150++ with blood tests, pap smear test and so on.

haha, thought that "you guys" would be everyone who is reading this thread?
thanks!

Naluri, Melawati = around 80-100
Damai, Melawati = around 80-100

hell, even the panty liners cost more in any clinic/hospital here... as long as the damn postcode starts 47xxx... you can expect to pay almost double! :p

don't even ask what an Angiogram would cost in SJMC? :(

canelle

15-08-2007, 08:49 AM

hi everyone, i'm new in this forum.
regarding the topic, i would need some recommendations on everything i need to care and research on, such as..

1. if i were to visit dr.delaila, how much will i need 2 spend roughly per month?
2. wat do i need to buy to get ready for the baby? milk powder, diapers..
3. how much to expect for a delivery in GH and medical centres? wanna compare all those prices.

me n my husband got this lil "accident" of mine few months ago. just found out that my baby is a boy. almost four months old! so excited to have him but we're a lil tight of budget as this is unexpected.. hope you guys can help!

congrats..
just a little info for ur question 1 based on my experience
Dr. Delaila is rather pricey
i think it will cost around rm 300++ per visit for monthly check, as her consultation cost is around rm 150++, then ultrasound, vitamin, etc.
if budget is ur concern i'd suggest u to see Dr. Siti
her charges is surprisingly cheap, could be half of Dr. Delaila..

cheers..

PDL

15-08-2007, 09:27 AM

First of all. Congratulations & may you have a safe pregnancy.

We went to QHC in Taipan to deliver our son years ago. They have a package deal that includes all pre-natal visits, vitamins until final delivery. Of course based on normal delivery. Maybe you can check them out. They have moved to USJ 9.

evelynlim

15-08-2007, 09:31 AM

Dear Wormi,
Congratulations to you. Well, if u really concern about the cost of check up & delivery, why not considering University Hospital?(Not the private wing!)
It may cause some inconveniences like waiting time, only available in the morning, not able to see the same doctor everytime(in fact u can choose to only see a particular doc for check up) etc but is worth it especially for people with tight budget.
My first child was born in UH 5 years ago, reason for choosing is UH is the best equiped hospital & my blood grp was o-ve. Just in case any complications occurs, I don't hv to worry about the delivery & of course the bill ;) For my case, it was a normal delivery with low forcep but if I were to give birth at private hospital, I would have already forced to deliver by ceasarean as it lasted for almost 12 hours. The only set back was the service after delivery where u need to take care of your baby yourself & the facility(don't expect it like SMC/SJMC), but the bills is so much cheaper.(easily more than 50% but not sure now)

Take care & good luck.Cheers.

cskok8

15-08-2007, 11:03 AM

UH (now called UMMC) only accepts "complicated" cases, but you sound like you qualify. All the facilities are there but as evelynlim says you have to put up with some inconveniences. In most (>99%) pregnancies and deliveries everything happens naturally without any intervention from the doctor (of course that does not stop them from charging you). It is to anticipate and handle the 1% of complications that all these check-ups and precautions are for. As in a plane crash, when things go wrong they do so very fast.

wormi

15-08-2007, 11:03 AM

thanks everyone for your replies, really appreciate them. UH would be too far for me if i were to drive myself there alone in pain, haha. my due is on feb nex year. my friend actually recommended me to go to Klinik Ibu and Kanak2 or something like dat, she told me that its dirt cheap!

wanted to ask these questions too.
1. where can i get a nice cot frame for my baby? how much would should i expect?
2. i'm having 2 shih tzu dogs, i dont want to let them go, but what can i do with them?
3. how much money do i need to have before i go into the delivery room? add additional emergency needs, if anything were to occur last minute..

i'm so lost now. my parents are far away in my hometown and i'm like so helpless. dont know what to do right now. so stressed up!

wsl

15-08-2007, 11:15 AM

Dear Wormi,

Congrats. My wife breastfeed my two children and it really save a lot of $$$ but it would take a lot of courage and hard work for the mum. She would express milk during lunch time while in office and both morning and evening at home in order to meet the baby demand. I suggest you start reading articles about breastfeeding and how to express milk and store them.
For gynae, the cheapest would be government hospital, if distance is not an issue, you can try the Putrajaya or Serdang hospital. The cost there is much cheaper than the private clinics or hospital.

Its quite unique to name your son Jayden. Any reason?

wormi

15-08-2007, 11:23 AM

i love the name Jayden but my husband likes Ralphael more. Ralph would sound kinda weird if you use it in malaysia rite?

thanks. would consider the nearest and safest place..

evan1222

15-08-2007, 11:29 AM

This is from a guy's point of view...i am sure you had great adv from our fellow sisters out there.

My wife gv birth at Sunway Med Center. Each visit cost around RM80-150 depends whether there's ultra sound and medicine/pills.
Total delivery cost with 2 jabs of epi , baby misc cost - approx. RM5500.
Then, nx 3 days, baby sent back for jaundice.. stayed a night, cost around RM500+.

Breast feed is the best! However, take into consideration...if chinese, normally they will take lots of ginger and wine so the alcohol content is high and heaty...this is what the old ppl say. So baby may also get rashes.
And, unfortunately, my wife could not produce much milk. SO in the end, have to go on S26 Gold.
This formula is good, my kid constipate well, and greenish becos it's made of vegetables compare to others using fish oil.
For breast feed, we bought pumps and lots of avent milk bottles to store in fridge, only a few times becos after a while, ran out of produce :)

No doubt Private centers are expensive, but looking at the mishaps and poor services at the pub hospitals, we were worried and rather pay more to hv better service and cleaner environment.
Since, the child is our treasure, no matter how, we hv to give him or her to best welcoming.

Congrats to you and .... it's a great feeling to be welcoming a new member to your family.

racheljansz

15-08-2007, 11:42 AM

wanted to ask these questions too.
1. where can i get a nice cot frame for my baby? how much would should i expect?
2. i'm having 2 shih tzu dogs, i dont want to let them go, but what can i do with them?
3. how much money do i need to have before i go into the delivery room? add additional emergency needs, if anything were to occur last minute..

i'm so lost now. my parents are far away in my hometown and i'm like so helpless. dont know what to do right now. so stressed up!
1. If you are not picky, you can get it in a garage sale or salvation army since you are not due till feb.
2. They will have to go, cos you will not be able to take care of them once the baby comes. From now till next year I am sure you can find good homes for them. I am quite surprise to know that you have furry pets since you have a severely asthmatic condition.

C-section is cheaper and quick but if you go for c-section your production of breast milk decrease rapidly. My last delivery suppose to be normal, then induce then turn out to be c-section after 23 hours. Then bill was RM12k! Very stressful. :D
3. Most places accept credit cards. You can do a credit card cash advancement with low interest rate payable over 12 months.

Do bear in mind to seek good medical advice as to what choice of delivery that is good for your health and the baby.

In the meantime start reading on books of interest so that it will keep your mind free from stress. Do light exercise like walking.

If you are close with your mother then call your mother on the phone chat with her on this, and maybe plan for her to be with you for the 1st two weeks after delivery.

wormi

15-08-2007, 11:54 AM

of course i'll need my mom's help. she's the dearest to me!
so its advisable to prepare around rm10k for the delivery, credit cards and so on la..
really need to consider on good and safe services despite of waiting in pub hospital..went into emergencies in UH, and it was a very undecent experience of mine. i was in pain and the nurses made me waited for 2hours in the emergency room b4 any doctors entertain me.

i will feel bad if i give my dogs away. they're like my own kids..sigh..

evelynlim

15-08-2007, 12:18 PM

cskok8, are u sure UH only accept complicated cases? :confused: I don't think so, my case is not a complicated one & I can see many women are not on complication as well. wormi, waited for 2 hours in the emergency room in UH is considered fast lah :p If u would like to go to UH, u should go to the gynae /delivery wad & registered & make your first check up appointment.
Of couse everyone would like to deliver a baby in a private hospital that is clean, modern with good facilities/services to give a best welcoming to the baby but not everyone can come out with the $$$$. Even they can struggle to come out with the thousands of ringgit, they will be in debts. Worth it? That's why nowadays I can see quite a lot of couples hesitating to have a baby due to the $$ constraints :( Sorry for side tracking the topic.

twohands

15-08-2007, 12:20 PM

Hello wormi,

firstly i'd like to congratulate you and your hubby on the happy occasion.
i think i will be one of the best person in this forum to answer your questions as i've just delivered a newborn baby boy 16 days ago :)

dr delaila is my ob-gyn and i delivered in sjmc. normal delivery with the use of vacumn.
http://www.usj.com.my/bulletin/upload/showthread.php?t=19380
1. if i were to visit dr.delaila, how much will i need 2 spend roughly per month?

it costs about a hundred plus a month, inclusive of the folic acid, and calcium and iron supplements. if there's a need for some blood tests or whatever tests, then it can go up to two hundred plus per month. it's usually a visit a month until about 8 weeks before delivery, then it's every two weeks and in the last month, it's every week. do go to her clinic in ss19 rather than visit her at sjmc as it is much pricier in sjmc. plus she's got a new 4d ultrasound scanner.

2. wat do i need to buy to get ready for the baby? milk powder, diapers..

i am fully breastfeeding our lil one at the moment, so i cannot comment on the prices of baby formula. i hear that it can get pretty costly. why don't you try breastfeeding in the beginning when you can, it's the best for the baby and hasten your recovery and weight loss as well.

as for diapers, we use the cheaper brands like carrefour for day use and the pricier mamy poko for night use. the baby can go through about 10 - 12 diaper in a day.

3. how much to expect for a delivery in GH and medical centres? wanna compare all those prices.

i delivered in sjmn. we paid about four thousand for the normal delivery plus the use of vacumn. this price is also inclusive of 2 night stay plus the meals and everything used and ubat used and all for the whole stay for mommy and baby. bear in mind i didn't use epidural for the delivery. epidural can cost up to a thousand plus depending on mother's weight and amount used.

you'll also need to look into expenditure for buying stuff for the baby. like clothes, cot, diapers, all the first aid necessities, the cotton, the bathtub, the pram, baby carrier, swaddles, blankets, bedsheets, all the bottles and steriliser and lots more little little stuff here and there that adds up.

as for your dogs, you don't have to give them away, but maybe you should think of having someone else look after them for a little while, cos believe me when i say you and hubby won't be having much rest and sleep or even time for much else when your little one arrives. it takes awhile to adjust to and get used to the little one's feeding, waking and sleeping times.

hope this helps :)

wormi

15-08-2007, 12:50 PM

thanks twohands and evelyn again..

woot a baby can go through 10-12 diapers per day?
dat would be very very expensive! thought of getting mammypoko too..
will stick with breastfeeding if i can produce enough milk..my aunt ended up complaining that she's having pain when she breastfeed, so her baby took infant's milk formula instead of the whole "saving cost breastfeeding plan"..

there's so many things i need to buy in this 5months, hopefully i'm not too late! i'll start with those basic neccesities like cot, beds,milk bottle n stuffs like dat..
i'm a young mother, only 19 this year. my hubby is 21. it was a hard time 2months ago when we were arguing whether to keep or not to keep Jayden. time flies, now we both getting ready, striving to get more money for him. many people see us as an immature couple, get into this kinda trouble at such a young age, but i think its da courage dat matters. furthermore, a life is a life, we shouldnt just take it away as though as its a mistake.

i'm getting lots of helps here from everyone. so touched. my parents did not reacted well when i told them i was pregnant bac then. it would b a hard journey for da 3 of us, but i'll try!

firefox

15-08-2007, 12:58 PM

Pretzels

15-08-2007, 12:59 PM

You and hubby are very courageous la :) You both did the right thing for your baby. Never would I think you're immature or whatever. You are very brave. Very happy for you.

I have no experience in childbirth whatsoever, yet :p but I'd like to congratulate and wish you all the very best too, from now to after delivery and many many moons after that with your precious new baby.

now we both getting ready, striving to get more money for him. many people see us as an immature couple, get into this kinda trouble at such a young age, but i think its da courage dat matters. furthermore, a life is a life, we shouldnt just take it away as though as its a mistake.

wormi

15-08-2007, 01:16 PM

many of my friends will choose to abort, but y kill a life when its you yourself who started the mistake? ages ago, our parents had us when they were this young too right?
my n my hubby are both taking our degree now. i hv 1 and half more years to go, same goes to him. our parents will be supporting our expenses till we finish our studies and get our career.. thats what we both wanted, at least a degree. a child will be a burden to us, but we dont mind. he didnt want Jayden at first, but things changed. haha.

thought of working part time while i'm taking my degree to get more income. our school fees will be paid by government loan, its just the living expenses we need to be aware of. sigh. so under pressure..

racheljansz

15-08-2007, 01:25 PM

....baby took infant's milk formula instead of the whole "saving cost breastfeeding plan"..
That is one of the many advantages of breastfeeding on top of what was mention by twohands - the best for the baby (in terms of immunization) and hasten your recovery and weight loss as well.

....i'm a young mother, only 19 this year. my hubby is 21...Both of us wish we were as young as both of you are right now. My youngest son is just 18 months and we are already feeling the age gap as he is now running all over the place.

Chia Hak Soon

15-08-2007, 01:31 PM

These days the cost of delivering a baby is high. My friend's son just had a baby girl in SJMC and he have spend 20,000 ringgit and still climbing, 'cos the baby is still under observation for jaundice.

Evelynlim is right, University Hospital have the latest medical equiptments and it is reasonably economical. Obviously, you have to wait and minus the immediate attention, but at the end you will realise that it is worth the inconviences. So, wormi, you and your hubby decide , 20k or more in private medical hospital or a mere 2k. or less in Government Hospital. Afterall, medically all are excelent.

wormi

15-08-2007, 01:45 PM

Chia Hak Soon

15-08-2007, 02:06 PM

Girl, come to your senses, if it is non-emergencies, wait. If you feel pain, I sure the available staff will consider your predicament. Your mum is rght, take her advice , since she is a govt servant and free of cost. I am sure many will envy you. Keep the cash and safe it to bring up your baby,. He may need it more than you need it for the delivery. A good sacrifice for a
happy future. Remember not many can have a privillege choice like yours.

God Bless you and hope that you take your mum's advice

bslee

15-08-2007, 02:24 PM

My gosh! you guys are very young, many youths of your age are still studying. Anyway all the best to you both and you will really need your parents and inlaws to help you through the way, afterall they must be young too.

They're not alone.. I WAS a dad at 20..but that was then...cost of living was a lot cheaper then..perhaps more than half of current COL. I'm glad its all behind me now.. If it was now..pengsan! ;)

cskok8

15-08-2007, 02:42 PM

evelynlim

15-08-2007, 02:59 PM

my mom did talked to me about government hospitals, as she is a government servant, i can get those services free of charge in UH. the thing i'm afraid of is i have to wait in pain, and they dont have much time to entertain "non-emergencies" like my case. sigh.

I totally agree with Chia as well.
Wormi, I don't know how u ended up at emergency ward where a lot of people are waiting . If u have already registered at the gynae ward which is a different block, they will entertain u without further delay. For my first delivery, I went to UH at 5++a.m. & I was entertained immediately by the nurses although is not on emergency case. Since u & your hubby is so young without a career yet, it is advisable to go to UH (semi-government) & save the bucks of money for future usage.
For breast feeding, you must first have a +ve mindset & believe that you will have enough flow for your baby. I breast fed my 2nd child till 19 months with supplement of soy formula infant milk & u can really see a different between a well breast fed child & a not breast fed child in terms of their health. Take care & be happy. One more thing, I admire your courage :)

LMei

15-08-2007, 03:25 PM

Wormi,
Congratulations and kudos to you for deciding to keep the baby. Giving birth at the government hospital as it's pros. You will indeed save a lot and I heard that even your baby's injections will be free. Check out some websites on baby stuff and pregnancy to help you out through this period. My favourites are www.babycenter.com and http://mymomsbest.com/forum/index.php

If you need any advise on pregnancy or baby stuff, you can always pm me and I will try my best to help you out.

LMei

15-08-2007, 03:30 PM

i will feel bad if i give my dogs away. they're like my own kids..sigh..
if your dogs are well trained, you do not have to give them away. My sis had had 2 dogs as well. However, one is not well trained and very naughty so she gave that one away and kept the other one.

Just make sure that when your baby is born, your dogs do not have any fleas and are kept out of the baby's room.

wormi

15-08-2007, 03:56 PM

thanks everyone again. guess i would be registering with the UMMC soon. do i need any deposits or what important documents to bring along?

breast feeding will b a good option to save bucks as my condition now, is not really consider, wealthy. haha.
i will keep my dogs then, but will need a cot to put my baby as my dogs they're allowed to roam free at home..

PDL

15-08-2007, 04:35 PM

Ask your relatives if any of them have children that have outgrown their cot that you can borrow. We got ours from my elder sister for free and then we gave it away when my son has outgrown it. Alternative, you can call up the Salvation Army warehouse in Puchong (pm me if u want the phone no.). They have second-hand cots priced from RM50 n above. Hope this helps with your budgeting.

wormi

17-08-2007, 10:20 AM

twohands

18-08-2007, 09:47 AM

perhaps you can also put in a "want to buy" thread in the Flea market section of this forum. some of the forumers here might have some things which are useful to you. then you don't have to fork out so much $$ for new things.

wormi

18-08-2007, 10:25 AM

actually i'm trying 2 get something from the salvation army and my relatives. stuffs like clothes, bouncer, i wont buy new ones cos they ade gave me half new ones..
the budget is 4 strollers, milk bottles, cloth diapers, milk powder stuffs that i cant get it 2nd hand..

tucing

19-08-2007, 12:54 AM

wormi,
I'd delivered my baby end of last May and by the time u want to deliver, you can buy our baby stuff secondhand :)
we have Avent manual ISIS pump that only use for 2 weeks, a very good condition infant carrier and 7 pieces of Mothercare newborn babysuit that only 4 of them used once! my baby too big to wear.;)

I decided for ceaserian when dr said, it might be difficult for me for normal delivery. So, the bill is predictable. I checked up at SJMC with dr siti, but the queue are really very very long. When I confirmed decide for ceaserian I went back hometown to deliver. I deliver at Pantai hospital Melaka, Single room 3 days 2 night cost me RM4500. +their service are excellence.

My officemate who deliver ceaserian at SJMC with Dr Tan cost her about RM5900.
My boss also deliver at SJMC ( not sure which dr) but she tried normal delivery, with 2 epidural then only ceaser, cost her RM9800. This is latest price, 2007 babies.

Normal delivery is the best, but when you're not too sure you can do it, ceaserian might be a better option.

If you can breastfeed, go on with it. Save a lot of money!.Formula milk are quite expensive. Our baby drink Enfalac A+ that cost us RM41.90 for 700 gram refilable pack. Lactogen maybe cheaper but for first baby, you always want the best , though baby never asked for it! :D

wombat

19-08-2007, 09:22 AM

in most cases natural birth is the best.

maybe in yr wife case is due to her bleeding complication, not due to her natural birth.

found out why the bleeding occur?

FIRSTLY, CONGRATS...

Guys! We're all WANTED! .... for advice... :p

Me think the ladies shud step up and start advising here... we men only good at causing 'accidents' or 'equipment failures' :D ... kidding!!

As to Q1. - as in any doctors' visitation - it varies.. depends on who and where and what is included in the pre-natal checks. (ie. ultrasound scan/blood test/blood pressure/supplements etc etc)

Q2. - also varies, premium milk like Enfa and Pediasure can cost more than 60ringgit per 1.8kg tin... Dumex, Nespray like in the mid RM30+ for big cans.

Q3. Delivery charges... NOW this is something you should look carefully into.
Are you going to try for NORMAL delivery or (opting for) by CAESAREAN. Normal delivery can be cheaper but mind you, if complications occur... the bloody bill is gonna go thru the roof (not to mention the trauma & stress for both mom and dad to be!) This is a choice you both have to sit down and discuss...

Normal delivery (IF no complications) healing faster and other benefits... faster to be back on your feet, up and running...

(Complications) add, FORCEPS delivery, VACUUM delivery and finally CAESAREAN... add stitches everywhere and lengthy recovery time...

My wife and I almost lost our son in 2002 because of this :( because thinking of opting for natural delivery and saving the extra money for other things for the baby. Ended up paying in excess of 10K at Sunway Medical because of the complications and son's Neonatal ICU costs... :( :(

My humble 2 sens, speak with your doctor and trust him/her on your options to delivery methods. If he is confident that you can go normal, then go... if he thinks otherwise, you better not TRY anything else...

cheers.

sherrygin

19-08-2007, 04:49 PM

wormi, congratulations! My best friend just gave birth recently and she might have some stuff that she can give away. I'll check with her and let you know.

sherrygin

20-08-2007, 12:14 AM

Wormi, I spoke to my friend about your predicament. According to her HUKM is pretty decent and they can even work out an installment plan for you for the delivery charges. I don't know where you live so you have to see if it's convenient for you. Otherwise, UH is ok.

Baby stuff - she has tons of stuff to give you, if I remember correctly - baby cot, stroller, bouncer, car seat, clothes, maybe even toiletries. Please pm me your contact number and we will arrange for something.

My friend has this to say: "Tell her it's very heartening to know that a 19 y/o is doing the right thing and being very brave about it".

twohands

20-08-2007, 10:11 AM

we are all here for you with whatever support we can give, be it moral, oral or in kind.

motherhood is not easy, but it's worth every drop of your blood, sweat and tears. there will be times when you feel you can't cope anymore, but don't worry, somehow or rather you'll always find a reservoir of reserve perseverance to "mother" on and you'll be rewarded with the looks and little blinks to coos and smiles later on. those little moments can bring on a surge of such a strong feeling of love and protectiveness only a parent will understand.

meanwhile, enjoy your second trimester (it's the best trimester ;) ) and may God be with you and bless you and the little one in your belly.

Ditto

20-08-2007, 10:37 AM

made some research these few days..
came up with this..
:::Prenatal Budget:::
Bathing accessories : rm300
Sleeping accessories : rm380
Travelling accessories : rm260
Feeding accessories : rm85
Dressing accessories : rm60
Gross total : rm1085

will prepare around rm2k for the babies's stuffs..its for the stroller, pacifier, milk powder, cots, and stuffs. clothes i got from my aunt, full set!
delivering in PPUM will cost around rm6 to rm13 for me even if i hv complications..3days 2nights..
anything i need 2 add on to the budget?

You can find some good bargain for used baby stuff at `Cash Converter'.
For your age, natural birth should not be a problem at all as you are considered in your `prime' age for pregnancy. The option of having the delivery at the GH is the most viable for you. No worrioes, you'll sail through it smoothly

USJ27Resident

20-08-2007, 11:31 PM

we are all here for you with whatever support we can give, be it moral, oral or in kind....

Haha... wormi.. :)

Me think you're gonna have a helluva headache with all the [honorary] uncles and aunties that you've just ended up with... nevertheless, do keep us posted on when/what/where/why+how... and me am pretty sure the "kepoh-chis" here will lend a helping hand.. when the time comes or if you are willing to accept or ask for it... :)

am also sure got many [honorary] godfathers and godmothers wannabes amongst the forummers too... :p

Just take care, stay well and eat well...

God bless...

ps... got stacks of baby clothes, safely & carefully stowed away - for girl and boy, just let us know when.. cheers

wormi

21-08-2007, 02:46 AM

sorry for replying late. was going thru hell these few days.
i was bleeding for around a week and my doc could not identify what is the cause of the bleeding. he says it might be placenta previa but its too early to identify. i bled too much and we had to let go of the baby - i aborted him.
if i did not do so, there's a high chance that i'll get a miscarriage, or even give birth to an abnormal child. throughout this un-encouraged pregnancy, learnt quite a lot of stuffs. i was told to abort him since he is 2 months old. been experiencing spots of bleeding, which the doc at first explained it as "the sticking of da embryo", and we ended up loosing him.
i was diagnosed with a high level of proestrogen - i think its this, din bother to remember cos i dont hv the mood to, which too high levels of it might make me have my period during my pregnancy. something like that.
apart of that, my husband - or soon husband to be is not being that supportive afterall. he says its a must that he marry me cos im carrying his child, but in da heart he's not willing to. so now, i'm like stuck half way, whether to sign the papers with him next week, or not to get married with him.
it'll b a hard birthday for me this year. celebrating my 19th birthday in 2days time. alone in my hometown where my "hubby" is concentrating on his exams, dats wat he says. sigh.
i'm tired of crying. just too tired.

sherrygin

21-08-2007, 08:57 AM

Hey wormi... So sorry to hear about the loss of the baby *HUGS*. I know it's hard, I can only imagine what you are going through... Just remember that sometimes things happen for a reason. You may feel so crappy now, like nothing is right, but some day, some way, you will know that there is a reason for things to turn out this way.

No one should ever get married because "they have to". Marriage should only happen when they want to. My advice to you wormi... DON'T sign the papers next week. You are still so young, you have the world at your feet. Do not be bound to another person. There's still so much to learn, so much to see, so many people to know.

My hp number is in your inbox. Call me.

twohands

21-08-2007, 11:14 AM

dear wormi,

i'm really sorry to hear the sad news. take some time off, strengthen your own health and don't think of anything else at the moment. as for signing of the papers, it can wait a couple more months or years after you've BOTH think things over.

we are all still here for support, as stated earlier, moral support, oral support or in kind..

take care of yourself dearie.

evelynlim

21-08-2007, 11:45 AM

Dear wormi,

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss of your baby. I agree with Sherrygin, sometimes things happened for a reason.
You have to move on in life, take care of yourself & health is the most important things to do right now. God bless you.

wormi

21-08-2007, 02:03 PM

firefox

21-08-2007, 02:27 PM

jus woke up. slept at 4.30am last night. jus couldnt close my eyes. i know u guys care for me. as for a 19 yearold girl, shouldnt i b happy and enjoying my school days, sometimes i really wonder y did i end up this way. cos of foolishness? or cos i claim to love him so much? duh.

to him, its a blessing cos i jus got rid of our "mistake". haha. im so speechless..

Wormi
You are one brave a girl who does not mind sharing your intimate feelings and problems to strangers on this forum...i woudn't have the time and patience if i was in your shoes...i would share this only to my immediate family and loved ones for their physical and emotional help.

Its better that you continue your studies as you are still young and dont tie your self so young and make this mistake again.

wormi

21-08-2007, 02:35 PM

evan1222

21-08-2007, 02:40 PM

having my sem break now. moving on to my 2nd year. by da time i graduate i'll b around 20 or 21.
haha..dat makes me proud. graduate early.

now im wondering whether did i make da right choice 2 abort Jayden. i should hv b more brave and accept my child although he might not be normal?

It's fate perhaps Wormi, u are still so young. Having a child in yr life now will change yr future. Maybe in a way, it's a blessing in disguise...u shud concentrate in yr studies and spend less time in yr so called love life. Once you grad, and enter the working world, u will be different, seeing things differently, meeting new people etc... I knw, becos happened to me a decade and half ago and so did my younger sis not too long ago. She is now happily married and migrated to another place now. Though i gv her the same adv.

coleslaw

21-08-2007, 05:31 PM

wormi,
there's lots of very sound advice given here..
don't dwell on what if....having a child at your age will not be easy what more if he's a special child.
concentrate on your studies and move on, you're still young.
if you are sexually active, do take precaution and don't depend on the guy ..go on the pills if you have to.
do not marry the guy..if you have to, postponed the wedding till you are both ready. he has not come across as being dependent nor responsible enough yet..good luck

wombat

21-08-2007, 05:41 PM

i thought bleeding is only a complication and doesnt necessary mean something is wrong with the foetus? how did the doctor found out? blood test or ultrascan or?

wormi

21-08-2007, 07:21 PM

i read thru some articles this afternoon.
i did not pay attention to what the doctor told me that evening, as what i was in my mind is how to make the decision, whether to keep the baby or not.

i'm suppose to have high level of progesterone, but mine is low. its not 100% proven that low progestrone level will lead to recurrent, but when the body is not ready to have the baby, it'll discard the baby on its own. i did not experience a miscarriage yet, but i bled throughout my whole pregnancy, which is not normal at all.
it was too early to determine whether my case is placentra previa or not, but the doctor did suspect this cause. excess bleeding might harm my body, even the baby. its possible dat i might have a miscarriage.
so in this case, i think its my own body reacting to the baby. not the baby's fault.

lilifjp

21-08-2007, 11:36 PM

Dear Wormi,

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your baby. Most of us are shocked. We have been reading about your determination & enjoying your preparations to welcome a new life.

I know your sadness because I too had placenta previa 5 years ago, experienced spotting but I managed to continue on the pregnancy until full term. I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl but she was born with birth defects & died 49 days later. Until today, I still think of my baby.

You did have some advise from your doctor. You have tried your best to keep your baby but you were bleeding. So, don't feel too guilty about it.

The best way to overcome this period of grief is to talk to other mothers who have experienced loss of a baby. By sharing, you will not feel too lonely and could lessen your sadness.

Your boyfriend is not having the same level of grief as you. I am sure he too felt the loss but most guys hide their feeling & do not show it. You will be frustrated with his attitude & might experience anger with him. Give yourself time to heal.

Please check your PM for my contact number. I am glad that you have found a caring community in usj.com. Many of us are concern for you.

((((((( Warm Hugs to you & Hope you are alright )))))))