urgent (abortion clinic) [Archive] - Page 2 - United Subang Jaya Web Forum

booya87

26-08-2007, 03:47 AM

Guys. Just wondering, how long after a certain intercourse only does it take for a professional (gynae, or a practitioner) to detect if someone is pregnant.
I had to admit I had intercourse with my girl and we did use contraceptives (Durex condoms) and after the intercourse, I noticed that there were some fluids close to the base on the inner surface of the condom. Not knowing if by chance that certain fluid(inside the condom) has leaked inside the vagina and what that fluid is *could be from the male, female or even the lubricants.
*Note : condom is not torn or defect in any way.

Being curious, I just would like to know how long after intercourse does it take to detect pregnancy? Lets say intercourse was on the 25/8, and the girl's period is due about 20+ days from now. Its quite safe as it is the 10th/11th day since her period. Just for reassurances, since it is still less then 24 hours after intercourse. Is it advisable to take the morning after pill or go straight to the gynae? Pregnancy test kits are useless at the moment as it is only still 1 day. And my girl has pretty consistent periods.

My girl is highly unsupportive of the idea of taking Postinor as we DO NOT want to jeopardize any sort of chances in the future. She is close to 100% confident that nothing would happen as it is just a couple of tiny droplets and its only her 10th/11th day, but we would just like to reassure ourselves. I would be glad if there IS anyway that we could reassure ourselves by the next 24 hours and to decide on the next step ASAP. Its best to get the assurances now as we DO NOT WANT to opt for any sort of abortion. Options that I have now is Postinor, visit a gynae(is it of any use) and just wait. We obviously do not know what fluid is that on the condom and all our lives we have been using contraceptives and have been engaging intercourse after studying her cycle carefully. This is the first incident that I spotted fluid on the condom and am pretty nervous about it. Please do advice on what we should do =) Thanks and have a nice day! Anyone available do please reply as soon as possible. Thanks again guys!

orchipalar

26-08-2007, 08:40 AM

I had to admit I had intercourse with my girl and we did use contraceptives (Durex condoms) and after the intercourse, I noticed that there were some fluids close to the base on the inner surface of the condom. Not knowing if by chance that certain fluid(inside the condom) has leaked inside the vagina and what that fluid is *could be from the male, female or even the lubricants.

*Note : condom is not torn or defect in any way.

Lets say intercourse was on the 25/8, and the girl's period is due about 20+ days from now. Its quite safe as it is the 10th/11th day since her period.

This is the first incident that I spotted fluid on the condom and am pretty nervous about it.Err buddy...1st n foremost...are you certain that the condom wasn't torn...?

A condom with a minute tear...could be hard to detect with just visual inspection.

You should have filled up the condom with water...or inflated it with air first...to ascertain whether there was any leakage...or not.

IF you are sure it was NOT torn...there shouldn't be any cause for you to worry much.

Secondly...you should NOT take for granted...as menstrual cycles defer from one woman to the next...n even on the same woman...it can vary from time to time due to illness or stress or other circumstances from time to time...

Neither can you assume that your understanding of the menstrual cycles n most importantly the fertility period(ovulation) of your g/f's...could be accurate all the time...

Just as you cannot be certain that after penetration...your sperms' life span in hers...could normally be anything between 1 day...to 5 days...or which could be as long ...as even until 7 or 8 days...which also varies from one man to another under various circumstances...from time to time.

So...please DO NOT DO guessing.

Pretzels

26-08-2007, 11:27 AM

I would be glad if there IS anyway that we could reassure ourselves by the next 24 hours and to decide on the next step ASAP.

You will never find out by the next 24 hours. The only way is to wait till she misses her next period and then take a pregnancy test.

Everytime you're having a good time, there is a possibility of making your gf pregnant, even using condoms. You should be using more than one form of birth control, since there is no single method that is fool proof.

All you can do at this point is to wait it out.

Pretzels

26-08-2007, 11:37 AM

I have gone through every single information about abortion, and gone through a lot of consideration. Yet I made my decision to do an abortion.

Anyone with abortion clinics address in KL area please PM me, before it's too late for me.
Before it's too late for your baby you mean...you may consider giving up your baby for adoption. Anyways, it's all up to you.

booya87

26-08-2007, 12:57 PM

I did filled it up with water and there were no leaks. We are sure of it. As for her menstrual cycle, we have been observing it for more than a year, even through exam periods, we don't engage in it often so we are really careful when it comes to things like this.

So i guess the best option is to wait? Gynaes wont be able to give any information at this time right? We really do not want to start on Postinor as well but if its a last resort for assurance we might just pop it once. We understand that no contraceptive is 100%, but as always prevention is better then cure. We really want to prevent any accidents from happening. Thanks again! =)
**20 hours and ticking**

lilifjp

27-08-2007, 12:46 AM

Hello Booya87,

Yr girlfriend is right by NOT taking the Prostinor Pills or any Chinese Medicine to induce abortion. We already have 3 cases of ectopic pregnancy here.

Ectopic Pregnancy means an embryo(baby) implants itself in the fallopian tube. If embryo grow to the size of walnut, it can cause the fallopian tube to burst, causing a medical emergency than can result in major bleeding or even death.

For any girl that has ectopic pregnancy, there is no way to reverse the problem & the doctor will remove the fallopian tube causing the permanent problem of difficulty to conceive in later years. Most of the girls who had ectopic pregnancy problem will suffer depression & low self esteem.

There is nothing much to do now but both of you have to wait & also pray hard that your gf is not pregnant.

You said that you girlfriend menstrual cycle is very accurate. Healthy menstrual cycle is 28 days. And you said she is 11 days after her period. That means she had her period on 14th August 2007 ? Her next period is 01st September 2007. You have to wait one week after Merdeka Day to test the Pregnancy Test Kit. It is Too Early to test now.

Let me talk to your girlfriend after she has tested the pregnancy test kit later. I want to make sure she is aware of her options that we are going to give her. A few girls have already decided to keep their baby.

Please send me a PM. We will find a way to help you.

lilifjp

27-08-2007, 01:00 AM

Dear Dsonch2,

You sounded really desperate. Have you tested the Home Pregnancy Test Kit. How long have you missed your period ?

At this moment, a Missed Period is Not a Confirmed Pregnancy yet unless you have been checked by a Gyne Doctor.

We had a funny case that a girl went to a Normal General Practioner (Lady Doctor) and instead of a pregnancy test, the doctor did a pap smear. Big miscommunication ! Another case, another girl told the doctor stomach cramp, hoping the doctor will do an ultrasound. The doctor gave diarrhea pills.

The reason why I asked because there are several cases are not pregnant. It must be the exam fever for SPM & STPM. Students can missed her period for 3 straight months when they are under Exam Stress.

Please check your PM, I would like to discuss with you further.

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

lilifjp

27-08-2007, 01:04 AM

Dear Rico,

I am waiting for a reply from you. It has been one week & there is no reply from you. Is your girlfriend ok ?

To check your messages, you need to Login. At the top of this page, login & key in your password.

Please reply so that we know you & your gf is alright.

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

gregcwho

28-08-2007, 02:19 AM

Hi booya87,

If assuming normal menses cycle is 28days,theoretically the egg would be released on d14..(d1=start of menses)...however there is a normal range of time when the egg can be released which can be as varied as early as d13 or as late as d15.The egg normally suvives about 1 day.Sperm normally survives 3 days..so pushing all probabilities..assuming early egg at d13,with sperm surviving 3 days..technically if you hve sex on d10 you still can get your gf pregnant..or even as late as d16.But this is theoretical in nature and the calculation method has been shown to be the most unreliable method of contraception.However I note both of you have taken measures so that reduces chances..my advise is to wait until her next period is due before doing anything else.

I think there are quite a lot of ppl willing to give advice & help so stay tuned..

Cheers.

lilifjp

28-08-2007, 10:09 AM

Hello Booya87,

You said that you girlfriend menstrual cycle is very accurate. Healthy menstrual cycle is 28 days. And you said she is 11 days after her period. That means she had her period on 14th August 2007 ? Her next period is 01st September 2007.

Oops.... sorry wrong calculations.

If the previous period was on 14th August 2007, the next cycle should be on 11th September 2007.

dsonch2

31-08-2007, 07:06 PM

Any idea how much it cost to take a pregnancy test in clinic?

tyr123

01-09-2007, 12:59 AM

undecided

01-09-2007, 02:32 PM

Any idea how much it cost to take a pregnancy test in clinic?

about rm 20 i think, the clinic i went consider quite pricy. They told me RM 20

undecided

01-09-2007, 02:35 PM

hello everybody..... i've read this thread n im new here....i've the same problem as many women who tried seeking help here... after some serious consideration. me and my bf have decided to do u-know-what operation as we really can't afford it... yet. after some "accident"....it's already been almost 1 month it seems.. can some1 here pls pm me the addresses of some u-know-what clinic?? your help will b greatly appreciated thanks :(

Before you do the u-know-what operation , ask the doc to do some ultrasound and show you. It's a wonderful sight that you shouldnt miss. :rolleyes: I was like you, making the decision to keep or abort, after the wonderful sight, i'm now in my fourth month pregnancy and still attending my college classes. :) Think throughly before you really decide to go to the u-know-what operation, cause it may have a great impact on yourself in your future. ;) Anything, feel free to pm me. Willing to share my experience with you

dsonch2

02-09-2007, 08:17 PM

What test will they run if i wanna check whether i'm pregnant? Will it be ultra sound or test a urine test?

orchipalar

02-09-2007, 10:32 PM

Err buddy dsonch2...in early stage of pregnancy...urine tests would usually be sufficient to determine your pregnancy.

Like Orchi repeated before...please PM or contact those that are offering help to you.

undecided

03-09-2007, 02:26 AM

What test will they run if i wanna check whether i'm pregnant? Will it be ultra sound or test a urine test?

urine test first

mummum

14-09-2007, 09:58 PM

i came across this poem tonight. it made me cry to think that there are people in this world, who would not take precautions having sex, and would want to abort their babies each and every time they got pregnant..as means of birth control?

Mommy I’m here..

Month One

Mommy
I am only a few inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in God's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

lilifjp

16-09-2007, 01:12 PM

Hi everyone,

Sorry, I was busy busy busy last week.

I know some of you tried to send me a message but my mailbox was full. Now, I have cleared the space.

If anyone wants to send a private message, you can send again now. :)

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

wsp

16-09-2007, 06:29 PM

hmm... having sex is fun... but girls, don't forget, the consequences will be haunting you for life if you are not prepared to get married... pls respect life and protect yourself too... having baby is one thing, the exposure to STD may give greater impact to women's fertility than men.

breakdown0904

25-09-2007, 09:56 PM

To go for the an abortion is just one of the worst things a human can ever do.

In my eyes its like performing a heinous crime like murder. I`ve received emails containing pictures of aborted babies and its just sad and very disturbing!

You ought to take responsibility in what you do and question your own conscience! :mad:

alsha

27-09-2007, 09:24 AM

hi! i feel abortion is cruel. it likes you are killing your own life and using a knife to cut your heart in two.
i'm married with two kids now.
after my first kid, about 1 yrs +, i found myself pregnant again. i'm happy but this time with so much complicated. i'm bleeding from my early pregnancy. my gynae doctor suspected maybe i will miscarriage. about 10 weeks, doctor confirm my fetus is abnormal. no heartbeat. my doctor ask me to wash it. that mean abortion. i cry and cry. why this is happen to me. i know this is not my fault, but i keep telling myself what i have done wrong. why you dont want to follow mummy. after the abortion, i keep thinking and crying. after that, about 1 years, i found myself pregnant again. this time, i very scared and nervous, will it be the same time again. no. my doctor said the fetus is normal and with a strong heartbeat. ah. i feel the whole world colorful again.
nine months later my second kid born.

My advice, think twice before what you have done. sex is enjoy and fun but you must responsibilty for what both of you have done.
once you abort it, you are killing your own flesh. life cannot take two.

:)

orchipalar

02-10-2007, 06:07 PM

Err buddies...this news made Orchi's otherwise quite a miserable day so far...

Thanks to this Usj.com.my webforum...n especially this thread...a beautiful n healthy baby gal is born today...to shine warmth n happiness upon a couple of very young Mommy n Daddy whom are 16 n 20yo respectively...n the grandparents.

Special thanks must go to the few angels of this community webforum...whom are constantly helping out the ones who needs help the most in dire real life situations...

Auntie Lily...Orchi salutes you.

lilifjp

02-10-2007, 06:53 PM

Hi everyone & Orchi,

I felt very very relief that this healthy baby girl is born safely in a Specialist Centre & not in a dirty college toilet etc.....
This 16 year old girl is really very brave & lucky to find us in this forum.

Alot of people have helped to save this baby. Not just me :o

For all the college boys out there, please think carefully about your future. If you want to have sex, you have to be prepared to be an express father. :D

Yes, thank you too to all the quiet angels in this forum..... :)

kokojo

05-10-2007, 10:42 AM

my gf been vomitting n feeling dizzy...she still waiting for her period tho...she said her part below da belly is bloated(somehow below da pusat of belly)...SHES 16....

kokojo

05-10-2007, 05:55 PM

vomitting n dizzyness has stopped...but da part below da tummy its hard n big....her last period stopped at 8th sept...dats wat i know....i need serious help...im 17 n havin spm next month...

lilifjp

06-10-2007, 12:30 AM

tummy its hard n big....her last period stopped at 8th sept...dats wat i know.....

Dear Kokojo,

If yr girlfriend last period was 8th Sept, she might be expecting her next period to be 5th October 2007 which is supposed to be today....

I think both of you worry too much because it cannot be that her baby grew so big in two weeks time.......

If yr girl friend is indeed pregnant, her stomach/womb will still be very very small and will not show yet ....

I seriously think your girl friend & you ate too much during these study week. :D

If it makes you feel any better, please ask your girl friend to send a PM (Private Message) to me and I will talk to her. Heart to Heart.

Hugs from Auntie Li Li

raZorblAde

06-10-2007, 12:59 AM

hi there everyone,

i'm too stuck in the same situation. read thru the posts and hopefully some forumers will be able to PM me the clinics...

me and my gf decided not to have the baby...but could you guys recommend those which are safe and no need for identification?

thanks a lot...

kokojo

06-10-2007, 01:10 PM

aunt lili,
she duwanna eat o even bath...huh...she dun even wanna sleep..dats y i doubt dat bcos da growing cant b dat quick..u make me feel better...i cant study my history until 2day...o...last periond fin at 8th sept now starts dat day...only i eat 2 much..she dun eat at all...erm...thx nyway

kokojo

06-10-2007, 01:12 PM

i mean last period finished at 8th sept...n she told me its growing bigger everyday...btw its below da bellybutton..

kokojo

06-10-2007, 07:20 PM

she started vomitting again..shes been vomitting seen sunday til friday it stopped.....but today she starts vomitting gain...huh..im so dead.

orchipalar

06-10-2007, 09:17 PM

Err buddy Kokojo...getting hysterical won't land you anywhere near comfort zone...

Should the symptoms persist...you should 1st take your g/f to a clinic to seek medical opinions on her current conditions asap...which may not necessary have anything to do with pregnancy...

An infection in the her digestive system or her urinary tracts or bladder might cause the bloating under the belly button...which may cause loathing or nausea reactions...

lilifjp

07-10-2007, 01:18 AM

she started vomitting again..shes been vomitting seen sunday til friday it stopped.....but today she starts vomitting gain...huh..im so dead.

Hi kokojo,

Orchi is right. Maybe, yr gf got other medical issues & not pregnant.

But please bring yr girl friend to a Klinik Wanita on Monday to have a medical check-up.If you go to a private clinic, you need to prepare about RM100 for check up & ultrasound test. Tell the nurse, she wants a pregnancy ultrasound check.

Yr girl friend need to drink about 1 litre of plain water so that can see the fetus clearly on the ultrasound. If doctor cannot see the small fetus, then the doctor will check for other problems.

This is the Only Best thing to do at this moment. To confirm what is wrong with yr girl friend. If you got no money to go private clinic, please queue at the Government Clinic Wanita & Kanak-kanak. Only RM1 for registration.

At least by next week, you will get your answer whether yr gf is pregnant or not. If no, you can now concentrate for your SPM exam studies. If yes, she is indeed pregnant, she has two more months to SPM, she can always sit for her SPM without anyone knowing she is pregnant. I will sort out the details with you later.

I tried to send you a PM but your nick name got some problem.

Please keep in touch, Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

raZorblAde

07-10-2007, 02:06 AM

OMG...i've seen that 'want-to-vomit' symptom with my gf, jz that she doesn't reli puke jz feeling nauseous?

is that a sign?i'm so dead too...and i tink i reli nid d list of clinics

La Vida Loca

08-10-2007, 02:32 PM

OMG...i've seen that 'want-to-vomit' symptom with my gf, jz that she doesn't reli puke jz feeling nauseous?

is that a sign?i'm so dead too...and i tink i reli nid d list of clinics
Abortion is illegal in Malaysia unless there is medical reason behind it. If you are caught, you will be prosecuted and sent to jail.
Jail time and fatherhood, you better choose wisely. Talk to your parents, although many would kick up a fuss, but when the little toddler comes along, all would be forgiven, unless you're such an unlikeable figure in the house.

alexkk

15-10-2007, 11:07 PM

er...
hi everyone..m 1st time using this thing..
i need a help.
i need the list of address of abortion center at seremban, negeri sembilan.
not me that pregnant nor my gf..
my friend's friend need it..
n i dunno much about her also..
so i just try my best to help them..
so please PM me asap..
thanks...

kwchang

16-10-2007, 12:04 AM

Alexkk, if you are a real FRIEND, you would not encourage your friend to get an abortion. That is an irresponsible coward's way out. If you have read the postings on this thread, you will find that we generally suggest alternatives to abortion. Please read.

lilifjp

16-10-2007, 11:16 AM

Alexkk,

I have sent a PM to u. Please check and get yr friend to call me.

Regards, Li Li

Good Guy

17-10-2007, 12:51 AM

Alexkk,

I have sent a PM to u. Please check and get yr friend to call me.

Regards, Li Li

Auntie Lili,

My greatest respect for you. May you have a long and healthy life! Just want you to know. :D

lilifjp

17-10-2007, 01:09 AM

Dear Good Guy,

Thank you for your post. I am a normal person. I am just a link for those who wants help out reaching to those who really wants to correct their mistakes.

I am extremely sad today bcos one healthy baby boy was aborted recently even though we have tried to help the young students. The baby was alive when aborted. The baby was normal, breathing & fully formed baby.

How cruel have we become ?

I am speechless........

Some of you might say where was I when I could have stop this from happening ? I actually went overseas for only 3 days for a meeting.

Firefly

17-10-2007, 03:56 PM

...extremely sad today bcos one healthy baby boy was aborted recently...This is so sad. :( I wonder if the parents of this life do feel any regret.

Good Guy

18-10-2007, 12:14 AM

online12793

25-10-2007, 10:38 AM

SYT = sweet young things, girls lah!

morning after pill = birth prevention pill taken after the deed. Birth control pills are taken on a daily basis and only effective on the 2nd month onwards(I think) For those who had "accidentally" DONE IT without any contraceptives, morning after pill is the only option, but it's got to be taken within a specified time(30mins to 6 hrs?)

kokomo, u r a really innocent boy! :p ;)

edit: Just found that Postinor2 can actually help to prevent a pregnancy if taken within 72 hours (3 days) of unprotected sex! Good news for some? :D

Yes morning after pill have to be taken within 48 hrs of doing the deed,
you will be safe if taken the pill in 48 hrs or less.
If taken the pill after 48 hrs expect 9 mths of worrying.

online12793

25-10-2007, 10:58 AM

Dear LMei, Sunway Kid, Aunty Bvine & Blue Jasmine,

Thank u for responding to Aze. I was away outstation for just 2 days.

Aze dear, we know that you are having some mix feelings right now. From the tone of your email, I do not think that you want to go for this abortion.

If you have second thought, please don't do it. ;<

Yes, it is true that we can continue to study & get good results & keep your baby. How are you going to do this ?

Personally, I don't think your college will kick you out if you are paying your college fees. If you are under scholarship, then...... you might lose your scholarship.

What I & a few ladys here are trying to do is to provide a temporary shelter for you & baby until you give birth. That means some one( a lady) will accompany you to UH for medical check up every month until your delivery period. We will find (by hook or by crook) a room for you if you require one. We are actually thinking of looking after you for less than 1 year until you are back on your life.

Unfortunately, there are a few cases that I talk to; involve Muslim ladies 21+ years of age. I would love to help, but we need to refer you to a Government shelter for any Muslim case.

I will PM you my handphone #. Please call me tomorrow after 10.00am.

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

After reading through so many pages this is the best one so far
and the most helpful.

Well done Auntie Li Li

online12793

25-10-2007, 11:09 AM

recently my girlfren's period is late. if there is any accident we usuali use postinor2. but very seldom(less than 5). she usuali gets her period a day or 2 after taking postinor2. the last time around march she took postinor2 and the priod came. then she has not gotten any period since. dat was earli march.. we both got worried and bought a pregnancy kit. test result negative. then we had accident again and she took postinor2 again.. this time however her period did not come. we plan to test with the pregnancy kit again. how accurate is those pregnancy kit? i cant remember the brand i bought.but its about rm20. shud i bring her to a gynae instead? if i should, where? any idea how much it would cost?

we are both scared and stressed because of this as our final exams are coming soon. then we will both be studying overseas and is it posible to go study overseas, unmarried and pregnant? i believe we need to do a full body check up before leaving overseas to study. :(

Use a Condom if you are scare plus it is much much cheaper than postinor2.

online12793

25-10-2007, 11:21 AM

Err bro Rocky...Orchi ain't trying to scare the kids...just trying to lay down what could be the worst case scenario...irrespective of whether pregnant or not.

But as much as Orchi could recall...in this country the age of consent is 18.

So she being 16 is a minor...n he at 17yo having sex with a minor...regardless of whether mutually consensual or not...n even if she gives consent...it is still regarded as a serious offense of committing statutory rape in Malaysian law.

Though when convicted the penalty carries a lesser jail terms(min. 3 years)...the offender could be whipped by minimum of 3 strokes of rotan...or something like that...

So buddy Helpless90...your mate she being pregnant or not...it is BEST you start to approach the matters at hands with serious considerations.

Start to open up to your parents n hers...n IF for any reasons...her parents object to it...meaning objecting to you having further sexual relationship with their daughter...no matter how much both of you may be in love...you should pay heed to hers as well as to your parents' advise.

There is a loophole which i found out about that.
If the girl is 16 and the guy is between 16 to 18 it is ok,
if the guy is 19 & above then it is classified as rape or without consent.

online12793

25-10-2007, 11:34 AM

did u wear condom or ur gf take any birth control pills?

It is best to wear a condom as you never know
your gf might have got HIV or AIDS from the previous bf.

online12793

25-10-2007, 11:36 AM

I have gone through every single information about abortion, and gone through a lot of consideration. Yet I made my decision to do an abortion.

Anyone with abortion clinics address in KL area please PM me, before it's too late for me.

Yes you have but you haven't talk Auntie Li Li yet.

online12793

25-10-2007, 11:40 AM

blackliliy

25-10-2007, 01:44 PM

since everybody is talking bout prostinor,i would like to know,is there any consequences if taking those pills in regular basis?anybody?

online12793

25-10-2007, 02:14 PM

Yes there is...
If the women wants to have a baby in the future might have got problems.

blackliliy

25-10-2007, 03:15 PM

online12793

25-10-2007, 04:23 PM

I would suggest that you stop taking them,
if you were want to conceive a child.

Big pharmaceutical companies will not put the side effects there
in some countries as there is no such a law stating that they have to.
In Boleh land pharmaceutical companies can get away with it.

In the USA & Australia i see a lot of pills like this have side effects
written on the box itself as those countries have a law stating that
pharmaceutical companies have to do that orelse they will get sued or fine.

Even panadol in the USA & Australia tell you what the side effects is.

La Vida Loca

25-10-2007, 05:51 PM

are u sure?because when i read the instruction,they didnt stated any indicator that might give such effect?ive taken the pills i think about 6-7 times already in 7 months time or less.scary..cause i love babies
You're interrupting with your menstrual cycle and that alone is already bad. You're suppose to have your period every 28-30 days. Postinor is a hormonal based drug that induces period by releasing progestron. Imagine having your period when you're not suppose to and the volume is pretty much lesser compare to normal cycle. You're at risk of developing cyst as dead tissues from half cycles (like postinor induced periods) are rarely eliminated from the system. In lay man's term, your uterus and reproduction system will be pretty clogged up.

amy_melanie

25-10-2007, 06:56 PM

It's saddening to see so many posts looking for abortion clinics. Auntie Li Li, I salute you and your brave and kind efforts to help these girls. Many of them keep saying that they don't have a choice, but IMHO, I truly believe that each and everyone of us always has a choice in life. Choose to not have sex out of wedlock (just say NO!), choose to not have unprotected sex, choose to keep the baby, choose to get married, choose to abort, the choice is yours. . .

You always have a choice. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Choose and deal with the consequences. But, a word of advice, make an informed choice. Don't act on compulsion or fear; they only breed regret. Get help. Speak to a doctor and councillor. There are many options out there! God bless.

wormi

26-10-2007, 07:36 PM

hi guys, i'm back again.
some people do know me cos i last posted in my own thread two months ago, and i aborted my baby, Jayden on august, this year.
had complications during my pregnancy and that was the only choice we can make. aunty lili understands this, haha..
i cant get her to my hometown as its too far.

btw, i need recommendations on these clinics, asking on behalf on my friend. since she's just a friend, i can advise her not-to-do-it, but it's still up to her whether she wants the baby or not. the least i can do is, get her a good n really equipped clinics.
[please, i'm just a friend, i cant force her to see some1 who's willing to help, i know lots of u r willing to help her. dats da least i can help - by looking for clinics, and the choices r on her hands. i rather she goes to a nice good clinic den end herself somewhere and endanger herself.]

and yes, she is 3 n half a week pregnant. period late by 1 day, double confirmed with two pregnancy tests.

thanks guys. hope u all can really help out.
remember, safe, and equipped.

dlyh81

27-10-2007, 06:25 PM

same here..i got a fren that need it too..rather than endanger her life, a better and "well know" clinic is better. i did advise her to talk to her parent but she jst not ready for it..

if anyone out there know bout it pls PM me with detail. thanks

dlyh81

28-10-2007, 09:27 AM

1 more question, did the birth control pil have side effect for the girl next time? if she wanna have baby later on will that be a problem?? just curious :D

raZorblAde

28-10-2007, 09:53 AM

i tink continuous use of the pill is going to pose a problem of bearing a baby next time

online12793

28-10-2007, 12:54 PM

Yes you are right in a way & it also will have miscarriage
as well as a side effects.

dlyh81

28-10-2007, 04:11 PM

how come some said is very safe?? cz of the new formula now..im not very sure but i heard or read somewhere on the net..not sure is it same in Malaysia.

wormi

28-10-2007, 07:59 PM

erm..for your information, you get let your girlfriend start using Yasmin. its a Hongkong brand if i'm not mistaken. high good reputation. the price is also double normal birthcontrol pills like Mercilon.

its best not to take of course. it'll lesser the chance that she can get conceived next time.

chewie

28-10-2007, 11:42 PM

dlyh81... talk to aunti lili... she can help you

even i know also i will not tell at all... :)

online12793

29-10-2007, 06:21 AM

how come some said is very safe?? cz of the new formula now..im not very sure but i heard or read somewhere on the net..not sure is it same in Malaysia.

They only said it is safe to take it as it will help 99% of the time not to get
pregnant, but they did not tell you that there is side effects link to the
drug orelse no one would buy it anymore.

wormi is right in saying its best not to take of course. it'll lesser the chance
that she can get conceived next time.
I agree to what wormi have said.

La Vida Loca

29-10-2007, 04:56 PM

There's a lot of ongoing research for birth control pills. If you read the thread on birth control pills, some brands are meant to control hormones than to prevent pregnancies. Now and then, there will be published reports of benefits of using birth control pills, like reduced risk of uterus cancer, heart attack etc.

Since only a handful of us here are qualified doctors and experts in birth control pills research. Who are we to say what is good and what is isn't. Ideally unmarried couples especially students should not engage in intercourse, but in reality that is not to be.

If doctors and GP can prescribed birth control pills to patients, can it be so harmful? Anyhow, some GPs recommend that you take a break after 3-4 successive cycles with birth control pills.

dlyh81

29-10-2007, 05:12 PM

i got another prob is that, my gf jst went to see doc and the doc told her she got some "water shadow" inside her which cause her period to skipped.. does anyone know wat is that and how to deal with it? cz she worry will this cause her pregnancy problem next time in the future or not..

online12793

30-10-2007, 01:37 PM

Just got this warning from friends today maybe it is an old story
but pass the message around please.

Thanks everyone

各位您好：
尤其是女士們，請警覺這個主題及小心保護
妳自己。
對於老是往舞會 (PUB)裡鑽的女士們，請小
心 ...，
當妳飲用由男生 (陌生人 or女生 )提供的飲
料時，請多警覺及多留心。

各位好男人，請好心地轉送這個訊息給你的
女士朋友們。有一種新的藥品在那種地方被使
用了不到一年了。一種黃體激素製劑
(Progesterex) 這種藥基本上是一種避孕藥丸，
這個藥現在被強暴加害者在
舞會上用在強姦受害者以及使受害者避孕。

一位朋友的母親在藥局工作，而她說這個藥
只由獸醫開立在使大型動物避孕之用，但我
聽到這個藥被與 Rohypnol(roofies) 一起當作約會
強姦藥來使用。

因為 Rohypnol的關係，強姦加害者們只要將
它放入她們的飲料中, 被下藥的女孩在第二天
早上不會記得前一晚所發生的事情。

現在 Rohypnol不單單被使用著。
Progester ex在飲料中容易溶解，而且
與 Rohypnol一起使用，所以強姦者不必擔憂幾個月後，
警檢單位以父源關係 [ 胎兒 ] 來認定強姦
加害者。但是這藥的影響並不是暫時性的。

Progesterex 設計給馬避孕用的，任何女
士吃了這個藥將一輩子無法懷孕。所有混蛋
只要拿這個藥即可遂其犯行。
它是如此地容易取得，而Progesterex
即將在各個校園裡出來。不管妳相不相信這個警
告，甚至在網路上都還有人教導別人如何使用它。

譯註：
＊請轉寄這個警告給任何妳(你)認
識的人, 尤其是年輕又天真的女孩們。
＊馬來西亞很可能不久就有歹徒會使用此種藥
品犯罪，請各位女士朋友們，多加提防。

La Vida Loca

30-10-2007, 02:23 PM

raZorblAde

30-10-2007, 09:00 PM

yeah...i think there are no qualified experts here...better to ask a doctor on that...

dlyh81

31-10-2007, 01:01 AM

aiya..i know also..but im just wanna know if anyone here had the same problem before or not.. :P

wormi

31-10-2007, 10:44 PM

water shadows can be a few things..
1. her period did not flow out correctly, got stucked inside for a long time.
2. she is pregnant n dats da first 4-5 weeks that how your baby will look like.
3. maybe she has some growth in the uterus.

why not ask the gynae again?
my "water sac" turned out to be my Jayden. haha.

online12793

01-11-2007, 08:17 AM

Found this on the net...

Month 1
Mommy, I am only 8 inches long, but I
have all my organs. I love the sound
of your voice. Every time I hear it, I
wave my arms and legs. The sound of
your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

Month 2
Mommy, today I learned how to suck my
thumb. If you could see me, you could
definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm
not big enough to survive outside my
home though. It is so nice and warm in
here.

Month 3
You know what Mommy, I'm a girl!! I
hope that makes you happy. I always
want you to be happy. I don't like it
when you cry. You sound so sad. It
makes me sad too, and I cry with you
even though you can't hear me.

Month 4
Mommy, my hair is starting to grow. It
is very short and fine, but I will
have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my
time exercising. I can turn my head
and curl my fingers and toes, and
stretch my arms and legs. I am
becoming quite good at it too.

Month 5
You went to the doctor today. Mommy,
he lied to you. He said that I'm not a
baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I
think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?

Month 6
I can hear that doctor again. I don't
like him. He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home. The
doctor called it a needle. Mommy what
is it? It burns! Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it! Mommy!! HELP
me!!

Month 7
Mommy, I am okay. I am in Jesus's
arms. he is holding me. He told me
about abortion. Why didn't you want
me, Mommy?
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

Sighhh so sad lah.. ):

lilifjp

02-11-2007, 01:00 PM

What test will they run if i wanna check whether i'm pregnant? Will it be ultra sound or test a urine test?

Dear dsonch2,

I have a PM for u. Please check.

lilifjp

02-11-2007, 01:30 PM

btw, i need recommendations on these clinics, asking on behalf on my friend. since she's just a friend, i can advise her not-to-do-it, but it's still up to her whether she wants the baby or not. the least i can do is, get her a good n really equipped clinics.
[please, i'm just a friend, i cant force her to see some1 who's willing to help...
and yes, she is 3 n half a week pregnant. period late by 1 day, double confirmed with two pregnancy tests.

Dear Wormi,

Have you given yr friend my hp# yet ? She did not call me yet. I am still waiting.

Support from boyfriend
If yr gf has full support & love from her boyfriend, I strongly feel we can save her from abortion. All the cases that we have now are boy friends who do want to take responsibility of the baby & gf. Some just run away. Some deny to their parents that they have girlfriends. That is why all the girls feel so rejected and went for the abortion due to the hatred they develop for their partner.

Grief
It is rather strange to me that you do not feel grief or sadness for your baby Jayden. Most girls or even married woman that I know; will feel extreme sadness after they go through the abortions. Some became very quiet and shun away from friends. Many cried their hearts out for weeks. I do not agree to abortions at all. But if the D&C was done because the fetus is not healthy, then it is the choice of the mother whether to terminate the baby or not. I will agree/understand if it is for a medical reason. I am in my late 30+ and naturally, a few of my friends go for Amniocentesis Test. If the baby has Down Syndrome or any health related problems, my friends will abort the baby. For me, even if my baby has Down Syndrome or Heart Problems, I will not do abortions and will care for my child until I am old.

Suicidal
The fact that anyone consider suicide is another sign that her boyfriend has no love for her. If a couple really have deep love for each other, they will sacrifice material wealth and will try every way to have a simple family even at a young age. We really have one case of a 16 yr old + 20 yr old who got married this June 2007, here in usj.com.

If yr friend tried to commit suicide once, it is very high chance she will try again later, whether she is pregnant or not.

Your friend need to seek professional help.

Confused
Wormi, you might think you are doing yr girl friend a favour by sending her to a abortion clinic. If she is pregnant, she is in a confused state of mind. Peer pressure for abortion do not mean she really wants to do the abortion. Imagine, if her boyfriend tells her that he will take responsibility & they get registered, do you think she wants to abort the baby ?

If you are really her good friend, you will seek the proper & right way to help her.

wormi

04-11-2007, 11:48 AM

she has done it already.
i have lots of friends who got married at a young age. 17 yearsold, even 12 yearsold.
so what happened to them? got divorced, no education, no high pay, cant get custody. she doesnt have love from her bf. the baby is unwanted. we cant force someone to keep the baby for the sake of the baby's life. till the end, will they blame us? that's not our choice to make. talks have been done, advised her not to do it, so did it work? we cant just think about the baby, but also how would it affect the poor couple. i did not send her to the abortion clinic. if she really wants to do it n i cant change her mind, y dont give her the address of some professional clinics to ensure she is safe?

Aunty Lili, i really dont understand why you are so pushy. i know you are trying to do good deeds, help those poor girls out there which are so helpless at that stage. it is wrong for you to judge me and tell me that i dont feel sad or grief for my Jayden. i cried, i tried to commit suicide, do you know? i hv scars on my tighs cos i cut them with a penknife to "transfer" the so called pain, do you know that? we havent even talk before, so how would you know i'm not sad about it? i've went through talking with both side of our parents, luckily my parents are supportive, but his parents arent. they didnt even care whether i was bleeding or in pain. the pregnancy lasted for around 4 months, i bled for 3 months. so should i still keep the baby although the doc insist that i have to abort it? should i grief in front of everyone i know, or for the rest of my life? not to move on?

when the boyfriend starts beating her up cos she's pregnant, telling her to abort the baby asap every night before she goes to sleep, is it my prob? i did not seek the proper way to help her? or is it up to her whether what she chose? she already made up her mind not to want the baby before i start looking for the clinic. its her life, what can i do about it? i'm not her mother. she has your phone number, but can i force her to call or sms you? peer pressure doesnt work here.

i believe you've gone through many cases, similiar to mine, or my friends'.
how many babies you manage to save, but how many cases out there that you didnt manage to change the mother's mind?
i'm sure you have failed, at least once. so i admit this is my failure of persuading her not to abort the baby.

i'm just trying to point out what happened and why she chosed that path. we're just meant to consult her, not force her to make decisions that she might or might not regret.

lilifjp

05-11-2007, 12:43 AM

she has done it already.
i have lots of friends who got married at a young age. 17 yearsold, even 12 yearsold....

when the boyfriend starts beating her up cos she's pregnant, telling her to abort the baby asap every night before she goes to sleep.....

Dear Wormi,

1. I expected that yr girlfriend have gone for the abortion.
2. Please list down the friend that got legally married at 12 years old. This is rape and it is definately a police case.
3. Please explain to me about the poor couple when most of you are in college and how on earth did all of these 17 years old girls paid their college fees ?
4. Boyfriend beating up a 17 year old pregnant girl ? This is clearly a police case. :mad:

How many years have you actually known your friend before she decided to do the abortion last week ? I don't think you are really close to this friend.

I am not a miracle worker. I cannot take away your pain. I cannot stop any girls who wants to commit suicide or kill a baby.

My dear young lady. It is not going to be me who wakes up guilty each morning.

wormi

05-11-2007, 09:37 AM

aunty lili,
you are experienced enough in these kind of cases. if you cant stop other girls from getting an abortion, how on earth can i stop her when i'm not even that experienced? she has your number, whether she calls you or not, it is not up to me to decide for her, dont you understand? i knew her since i was very young. we are very close. we know everything about each other, but that wouldnt make a difference if she really made up her mind that she doesnt want the baby. so what can i do if she really thinks that way? tell her i'm going to support her morally, or boycott her straightaway?

we have different minds, that why now its like so controversial. you can afford to pay for girls who wants to give birth to babies, help them throughout thick and thin. to you, you're doing a good deed, helping out everything you can. but to me, if they cant even afford to pay for the hospital fees, why have the baby? lets say you can help them till the baby turns 3 yearsold and till they know how to fully take care of the baby. will there be a bond between the mummy and the baby? you'll feel even hurt when the mummy comes back and tell you she wants the baby back. raising a baby is very hard. i wanted to raise Jayden cos i have fully support from my parents that time. my friend doesnt have any support. she cant just go back and tell the parents, "mom, i need money cos i'm having a baby and my boyfriend doesnt want the child."

how is she going to go back for chinese new year, let all the relatives see her tummy and spread the news that she is pregnant? my cousin was like that. yet she gave birth to the baby. there's a very mild bond between the baby and her. the baby is already 4 yearsold now, and she's working overseas. always plan to take her abroad, study in international school, but after a week, she calls up her mom to get the girl back to the centre, ti-ratana, if you want to know where. my aunty doesnt want to bring the poor little girl back cos she says that will ruin their family's reputation in my hometown. everytime she brings her back to my hometown for two days, she'll introduce her as "an orphan from the centre her daughter used to work with". my niece is lucky enough to have a kind couple, in their 40s, taking good care of her unofficially. they bought gold necklace, new computers for this 4 yearold girl. yet, my cousin insists that she is not giving the girl away for adoption. i feel so sad for my niece, having identity crisis all over, thats why i dowan another case like this to happen.

i tried talking to her telling her the pros and cons of having a baby, and you're willing to help, she can stay at your centre till she gives birth. it is all free of charge, yet she can have her baby back if she wants. there's a nun taking care of her always if she stays there. told her all these, if she still wants to abort the child, should i just strangle her, kidnap her and pass it to you? = =

about the 12 yearold case, yes, its illegal. she had the baby two years ago. she has to wait till she is 16 before they can get legally married. not sure whether what they filled into the birth cert. cant ask those privacy stuffs.

17 yearold college fees. her dad is around 60 this year, still striving for her allowance and money to support the family. luckily the guy's side is kinda wealthy. the couple was in KDU that time when they found out that the girl is pregnant. they got married, 50 tables, chinese way of ceremony. the girl gave birth to a healthy baby boy this march, and she's now 5-6 months pregnant again. the husband used to be my very very good friend. we always come out and have yum cha sessions always during the school days. after the marriage, he has to work from 9am-9pm as a sales man. our whole gang of friends did not get invited to the wedding. he's not allowed to come out and meet us anymore. all our friends tried to "ajak" him out, but he ignores us or gives us excuses.

my friend is 19 yearsold la. not 17. i did not state it earlier rite..
and when they fought one day cos the girl wanted to go out and meet some other guy's friend, he raped her. she nearly made a police report. the guy's mom called her up and tell her not to do "stupid" stuffs, better go back to the hometown, sit down and talk it over. she was humiliated by the buy's mother by refering her as an immature, stupid,... what more..girl. the baby was a "product" of the rape. furthermore, the guy's mother doesnt know about it. she doesnt wanna get humiliated again. she was really stupid for not making that police report. should have gave her more support that time than telling her not to make things "big".

auntylili,
i know you want to help her, i want to help her too. i already tried my best. its nice to have kids. everytime i see mothers will strollers, holding their babies, my tears start to drop. i din tell her that she needs an abortion. its her own choice. yes you cant make the pain disappear, but you can surely add into other's pain.

lilifjp

05-11-2007, 10:31 PM

Ok everyone. I think this discussion got over heated. Let's sit back, relax and enjoy this email while I think of some positive reply for Wormi.

Women's Favourite E-mail of the Year!
>
>
> A man was sick and tired of going to work every day
>while his wife stayed home.
> He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
> "Dear Lord:
> I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife
>merely stays at home.
> I want her to know what I go through.
> So, please allow her body to switch with mine for a day.
> Amen!"
>
> God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.
> The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
> He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate,
> Awakened the kids,
> Set out their school clothes,
> Fed them breakfast,
> Packed their lunches,
> Drove them to school,
> Came home and picked up the dry cleaning,
> Took it to the cleaners
> And stopped at the bank to make a deposit,
>
> Went grocery shopping,
> Then drove home to put away the groceries,
> Paid the bills and balanced the check book.
> He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.
> Then, it was already 1.00pm
> And he hurried to make the beds,
> Do the laundry, vacuum,
> Dust,
> And sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
> Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an
>argument with them on the way home.
> Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to
>do their homework.
> Then, set up the ironing board and watched TV while he
>did the ironing.
> At 4:30pm he began peeling potatoes and washing
>vegetables for salad, breaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for
>supper.
>
> After supper,
> He cleaned the kitchen,
> Ran the dishwasher,
> Folded laundry,
> Bathed the kids,
> And put them to bed.
> At 9.00pm
> He was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't
>finished, he went to bed where he was expected to make love, which he
>managed to get through without complaint.
>
> The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the
>bed and said: - "Lord, I don't know what I was thinking.
> I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home
>all day. Please, oh! Oh! Please, let us trade back.
> Amen!"
>
> The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: "My son, I
>feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change things back
>to the way they were. You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got
>pregnant last night."
>
>
> This has been voted Women's Favorite E-mail of the Year!
>
> If you agree, send it to all your friends who would
>enjoy this!
>
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>
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>
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>

lilifjp

05-11-2007, 10:55 PM

hi guys, i'm back again.
some people do know me cos i last posted in my own thread two months...

btw, i need recommendations on these clinics, asking on behalf on my friend. since she's just a friend, i can advise her not-to-do-it, but it's still up to her whether she wants the baby or not. the least i can do is, get her a good n really equipped clinics.
[please, i'm just a friend, i cant force her to see some1 who's willing to help, i know lots of u r willing to help her. dats da least i can help - by looking for clinics, and the choices r on her hands. i rather she goes to a nice good clinic den end herself somewhere and endanger herself.]

and yes, she is 3 n half a week pregnant. period late by 1 day, double confirmed with two pregnancy tests.

thanks guys. hope u all can really help out.
remember, safe, and equipped.
Ok, now. Everyone relaxed alreadi.....

From these current posts, Wormi said that 19 year old girl is just a friend. This post was on 26th October 2007. This was also the same day that I actually talk to Wormi for the 1st time. Prior to that, Wormi was posting actively on 14th August that she was pregnant and happily staying pregnant until her doctor said there was something wrong. She also said that her gyne doctor insist she go for an abortion ? No doctor that I know will insist for anyone to abort a baby. Your parents are supportive, which means that the doctor would have consulted your parents since you are below 20 years old when you do the abortion....

I will not comment further on any of Wormi postings after this. There are contradictions in what Wormi told me and what she actually wrote.

I am so sorry that I do not have any experience in comforting anyone who have done the abortion. I have a baby that pass away in 2002. She is part of me and will always be my special baby.

I am trying to help those boys/girls who are at a cross-road. Those who loves children and do not want to sacrifice their 1st born. :(

wormi

05-11-2007, 11:19 PM

i would not say anything further about my friend.
but about my Jayden, i think i should stand up for him. yes my parents are supportive, they say they want me to be happy, they hope i can make the best choice for myself. if i dont want Jayden, i would not have asked for all the forumer's help, on where to get stuffs for my baby, and stuffs like that. no doctors would ask the patient to make choices that would endanger any side of the patient. they have to sacrifice the baby due to medical reasons. if the baby would cause the patient to die, the doctor wont ask the patient to abort the baby? bleeding throughout the pregnancy hurts a lot, and its very dangerous. its not like normal spotting. i've been bleeding almost everyday. that is not normal. so should i sit down and still carry Jayden while i have chances to get miscarriages, placenta previa, early labour, or even giv birth to an abnormal child which not everybody can accept? i can honestly tell everyone here i'm not ready to have an abnormal child yet. i dont have the courage, nor the strong heart to accept these.

my mom signed the papers for me to undergo the abortion under the consultation of the doctor. i do not have to further explain more about my Jayden, since aunty Lili has already made up her mind, believed that there are contradictions in what i've told her and what i actually wrote.

not only people who gave birth to the baby, and lost the baby will feel the pain. not all people should sink themselves in guilt and sorrow, since its already our fate. explanations will just make things worst right? prejudices and preconceptions are already there. i tried to explain that you really have a good heart and your willing to help. if you really did read through all my posts, you should know that i'm actually just trying to point out how i feel, and trying to help a friend. i'm not flamming either. i've tried my best and thats what i can only do. to all who thinks that i'm a liar, i dont mind. i know what happened to me in august.

*peace*

wormi

05-11-2007, 11:20 PM

btw, you told me that you were just a phone call away, but why didnt you answer my call that day? thats different from what you told me. i needed someone to talk to. i can call you right?

lilifjp

06-11-2007, 09:01 AM

Dear Wormi,

Between 14th August 2007 to 31st August 2007 ( Merdeka Day), I am right here in KL and there was no telephone call from you.

I would like to assure you that this is a group help and someone in this group have indeed called you during that time and we were informed that you were ok.

As for your 19 year old friend, you have actually labelled me as "pushy".

At this moment, it is best that anyone who are feeling hurt and down because of the abortion to contact Befrienders.

Befrienders KL, tel : 03-79568144, 03-79568145 ( 24 hours open)
Befrienders Penang, tel : 04-6585108, 04-6585161 ( 5.30pm to 10.30pm)
Befrienders Ipoh, tel : 05-577933,05-577955 (4 pm to midnight)
Befrienders Melaka, tel : 06-2842500 (7 pm to midnight)
Befrienders Seremban, tel : 06-7653588,06-7653589 (7pm to 10pm)
Befrienders JB, tel : 07-3312300 ( 7pm to 10pm).

wormi

06-11-2007, 05:43 PM

can we just call them up to talk? details kept confidential?

chewie

06-11-2007, 06:18 PM

wormi... details are being kept confidential... u also can give them a false name

online12793

06-11-2007, 06:49 PM

wormi,

You can call yourself whatever you want,
they are there to help you get the problems fix.

wormi

06-11-2007, 10:15 PM

like they will give advise, or they just sit down and listen to you on the phone?

coleslaw

06-11-2007, 10:38 PM

why don't you just dial one of the numbers provided and enquire...

melissa

07-11-2007, 02:28 PM

ya, i really want to know the location of the abortion clinic that near the "meng tian".
so can u pls tell me the location?
or any contact no of the abortion clinic?
urgent~!
thanks lah~!

can i know where is the abortion clinic please...??? can i have thier contact number plss??? ugent..thank you!

chewie

09-11-2007, 01:09 PM

melissa...call aunty lili.. she can help you..dun do abortion..u will regret for the rest of your life....

minobu

09-11-2007, 02:34 PM

can i have aunty lili contact?

i got some questions i need to ask her too.

i left a private msg to her, but she didnt reply me

chewie

09-11-2007, 03:10 PM

maybe she is busy with her work..give her sometime to reply back to the PM okie..

minobu

09-11-2007, 03:52 PM

alright. thanks for your reply ^^

lilifjp

11-11-2007, 02:01 AM

For everyone's update...

Miss Minobu got her period :D already.

Cheers......

online12793

11-11-2007, 09:59 AM

phewwww what a relief...

lilifjp

11-11-2007, 05:35 PM

Ya, I thought everyone will be happy for Minobu.

Majority of the girls got their period late. Just like the girl in Miri, late for 3 months. Like I mention so many times.... Exam fever now. You all concentrate on yr studies lar :p

The things that I cannot handle are suicidal cases. It is not that I do not care. I really care too much and it is best you get a correct support group to help you.

I am leaving to a sales meeting again tonight. MH20. Getting grilled by my boss.

Meantime, take care & I will try to be online.

minobu

12-11-2007, 05:38 PM

thanks for everyone's concern.

i think i was too stress out, worry being pregnant (the possiblity is there no matter what). my bf was really confident at first, he said it's impossible. but eventually, cus of my think-too-much brain, he got affected too

thanks alot to aunt lili ^.^

Haiz4eva

13-11-2007, 10:41 PM

lol...so a late period can be due to overstress also and not only because of pregnancy...heh never though id bump in to a forum like this...cause now currently i am worrying my ass off(in a controlled manner)...im only 17 but me and my bf got a little excited and yea we did it...unprotected too...now my period is coming late...its the 33rd day after my last period....this was the longest time i had to wait for my period to come but now...gosh...this is not what i want..i have done 2 pregnancy test and their both negative..i just hope things works out...

jianwei85

14-11-2007, 02:32 AM

usually pregnancy test kits will detect hCG hormones effectively by 2nd week of delay in period. so most probably you might not be pregnant. please exercise caution and protection if enganging in high risk sexual activities such as unprotected sexual intercourse. however, if your pregnancy is late by a month, another test is advisable. ensure that all instructions are followed. for example, early morning urine provides more accurate result as hCG hormones will be present in a more 'concentrated' form. besides, some test kit will recommend to stay away from certain food before taking the test.

here is a weblink; http://thepregnancytest.com/ It is an "online Pregnancy Probability Test which utilizes your natural menstrual cycle and date of intercourse to plot a mathmatical calculation which indicates the likelihood of pregnancy." -thepregnancytest.com

take care n be safe.

Haiz4eva

14-11-2007, 10:41 AM

gosh 11%.....but even if my period comes i heard there will still be a chance that i am pregnant...right?

chewie

14-11-2007, 03:23 PM

Haiz4eva... go and visit a gyne to confirm whether u r pregnent or not. they will use a scanner which will be inserted to your virgina to see if you are pregnent.

Haiz4eva

14-11-2007, 09:07 PM

can i get number and address to trustable gynae's?

Haiz4eva

14-11-2007, 10:34 PM

lol nevermind period just came....thx anyways ppl here... :D

Karjo

17-11-2007, 04:46 AM

Hi,
Everyone is talking about abortion. Can someone advice on getting pregnant?
thanks

online12793

17-11-2007, 11:02 AM

Karjo,

You might like to start a new thread about this topic.

babymel

19-11-2007, 09:03 AM

hie.. im worry that im pregnant.. have been late for 4 days.. but check with pregnancy test it show negative.. so wut can i do?

LMei

19-11-2007, 01:51 PM

hie.. im worry that im pregnant.. have been late for 4 days.. but check with pregnancy test it show negative.. so wut can i do?
Hi Babymel, you should normally wait a week before you test. Try again after a few more days and if it still show negative, maybe you are just stress out. Remember, the more you worry bout your period, the later it might come.

Karjo

09-12-2007, 04:30 PM

Pregnancy test can be done as early as 10 days after conception, which is one to two days after implantation (ovulation and fertility plays their here) HCG hormone appears in the blood and urine of pregnant women, which is possible to be traced before you miss your period. Once you miss your period, you are conceiving for 3 weeks.

Use early morning urine as the contain of HCG will be higher.

If you are not using first morning urine, make sure that your urine has been in your bladder at leart for 4 hours.
Do not drink excessive amounts of fluid in an attempt to increase the volume of urine, this can dilute the urine, making hCG not as detectable.
If you are taking any medications, including fertility drugs, read the package inserts before testing to see if your medications will affect the results.

mantis

31-01-2008, 01:59 AM

LMei

31-01-2008, 02:01 PM

Hi Mantis,
Near 3 months is not safe for an abortion. Why go through with the pregnancy and if you are still not ready, consider giving the baby up for adoption. At least your baby has a chance to life.

mantis

31-01-2008, 05:03 PM

Her period come late sometimes, so I dont suspect anything at 1st, but when itshe still doesnt have her period after 2 months, i started to suspect something. There is no way we can keep the child. We'll be having a hard time if the pregnancy goes on, coz she's studying in another state. Plz help me..

siew.wai

31-01-2008, 08:43 PM

by doing abortion, u will feel guilty forever.

pls think before you do anything. if you are not ready to have a baby, dun make love then. Now u are killing because of ur few mins pleasure.

USJ27Resident

31-01-2008, 10:42 PM

Hi all, i've been reading this thread for quite a while now, just to gain valueble informations regarding the topic. However, the worst has happened, my gf is pregnant, should be around 2 1/2 months (pregnancy test shows positive). With our current age (21) and status (student), it is impossible for us to keep the child and I want to go with abortion. I really need to know the name of the clinic in kelana jaya and how to apply for an abortion there (with the fees,if possible). Plz help me. I need help A.S.A.P coz she's getting near 3 months pregnant.. Plz..

21 years old and don't know about safe sex/protection before having fun? :mad: There is a saying... if you wanna go get wet in the rain, make sure you wear a rain coat... :rolleyes: you are what I would call, a parent's worst nightmare for their daughter... you'd be lucky if the father doesn't shoot you...

Now that your gf is pregnant, you want the easy way out... abortion? Tell you what - you go for the D&C :rolleyes: , your gf might just wanna keep the baby - without you in the picture !

Now that you kena the lecture... if you really need/want help - PM me... :rolleyes:

mantis

01-02-2008, 10:15 AM

I already sent a PM, USJ27. I desperately need help and time is running out. Plz help me..

USJ27Resident

02-02-2008, 02:34 AM

I already sent a PM, USJ27. I desperately need help and time is running out. Plz help me..

Your PM not very clear...

Question?
You/your gf don't want the baby or issit your gf pregnancy cannot be made known ? Her parents :eek: know about this matter? Is that the reason why your time is running out.... :eek:

Whatever the case... you need to talk it out - like I said, I am willing to help! One mistake is good enough to regret a life time... just make sure you are not gonna make another decision that is gonna haunt you and your conscience (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conscience) for the rest of your life...

jianwei85

02-02-2008, 07:06 PM

eh..usj27... wiki-ed conscience ar... ^^

mantis bro..have u had a "sit-thru-heart -to-heart" talk with ur gf? if u r making this decision for her..then have to stop n ask her..

Teff

02-02-2008, 07:41 PM

hi there..i am guessing this is like your first time? I dunno, by the sounds of it and the way u fear that there might be some "leakage" despite the protection somehow gives me that idea. Correct me if am wrong, but the only way for you to know that you are really pregnant and require an abortion to be performed by an authorized practitioner is to take a PT within 4-6 weeks post unsafe intercourse. Be on the lookout immediately when you miss your period the following month. Anyhow, the next time around, please be very careful. If you feel that you might have experienced some sorta leakage again, pls consider taking POSTINOR, if am not mistaken it is effective within 72 hours of unprotected intercourse. But please dont use Postinor regularly as it may cause infertility in the long run. And i bvelieve it may cause unnecessary internal bleeding. Cheers, and all the best to you.

USJ27Resident

02-02-2008, 10:54 PM

IMHO, the reason why it is so easy for people choose to take the easy way out in this situation is because they don't see the "END RESULT" or "BY PRODUCT" of an abortion...

So please NOTE, Not to be seen by those intending NOT TO SEE the results (http://www.trosch.org/pas/11-12wks.html) of an abortion or better known as D & C...

(Discretion is advised, graphic nature !)

Mantis, weigh your options! That is all we ask...

I have a friend - 20 years of marriage - NO KIDS/CHILDREN... why? because the wife think it is payback from the ONE abortion she did when she was 17 !

USJ27Resident

02-02-2008, 11:14 PM

Mantis, Just so you know about.. [extract from the UK RTL factsheet]* nil copyright disclaimers

abortion

Abortion is the deliberately or spontaneous (miscarriage) ending of a pregnancy. When we hear the term abortion nowadays, it almost exclusively refers to the deliberate ending of a pregnancy.

LIFE BEFORE BIRTH
From the moment of conception, the early embryo is alive. It is human. The physical characteristics of that human being are already decided - colour of eyes and hair, even the height and build to which the woman or man will eventually grow. Between days 6 and 12, the embryo becomes implanted in the womb.
By days 24-28, the head is distinct, and the early eyes, liver, brain, pancreas, lungs and kidneys are present. The heart is beating, and nutrition and oxygen are taken from the mother through the umbilical cord. Even so, the developing child has her own, completely separate, blood supply - often with a different blood group from her mother. By about day 33, ear development has begun, nostrils are present, and limbs are beginning to take shape. By about day 44, fingers and toes are distinct, the external ear is well advanced, and eyelids are beginning to cover the eyes. By ten weeks into the pregnancy, the human fetus (a term which comes from the Latin, to mean "Little One") is complete. Growth is now the only thing that happens until the time of birth.
Most abortions take place at about 11 weeks of pregnancy, when the outline and features of a human baby are complete. To the eye, he or she is unmistakably a human baby at this stage. All organs are functioning - the stomach, kidneys, liver and brain - and she will swallow, digest and urinate. Amazing movements are possible, and with the use of ultrasound it is possible to watch a child turning somersaults in the womb to find the most comfortable position for him/herself.

IS ABORTION AN ETHICAL ISSUE?
The ethics of healthcare professionals, as well as those of society as a whole, are called into question by the practice of abortion. When society allows healthcare professionals to kill a creature which has every appearance of being a human baby, it makes a serious statement about the value of human life.

HOW IS AN ABORTION PERFORMED?
Abortions are carried out by dismembering, poisoning, and/or the premature expulsion of the fetus from the womb. There are five main methods, all of which involve physical risks for the woman and the possibility of serious psychological harm which can last for years, if not for life.

1. Suction method
This is most common form of abortion. This is performed to abort babies up to around the 12th week of pregnancy. First of all, the neck of the womb has to be dilated (opened up) using a catheter. When there is a hole big enough, a vacuum pump is then inserted into the womb, with suction power of about 25 times that of a domestic vacuum cleaner. The fetus is then dismembered and the pieces are sucked through the tube into a bottle. There is a risk of the womb being perforated with this method of abortion.

2. Dilation & curettage method-commonly used in Malaysia!
For this type of abortion, dilation is also needed, and after an opening is created and forceps used to keep it open, a loop-shaped steel knife called a curette is inserted into the womb cavity. The abortionist then cuts the fetus into sections with this instrument, and scrapes the remains into a container. There can be considerable bleeding with this method of abortion. After the operation, a nurse will check that all the parts of the fetus' body have been removed from the womb. An incomplete abortion could result in a haemorrhage, sepsis or the loss, or premature delivery, of any subsequent pregnancy.

3. Saline method
At 16 weeks or over, this method of abortion involves the removal of the amniotic fluid which surrounds the fetus in the womb, and its replacement with a strong salt solution. The fetus can take more than an hour to die with this method of abortion, and after about 24 hours the woman goes into labour and delivers a dead baby. This method of abortion is now rarely used in Britain because of the risks of injecting a fatal dose of salt into the body, but it is still widely used in other European countries and in America. With this form of abortion, there is a risk of haemorrhage, infection and the retention of the placenta, which then has to be surgically removed.

4. Prostaglandin method
This is another way of terminating a later pregnancy, and was originally licensed for a pregnancy of between three and six months. The drug Prostaglandin can be given like saline, straight into the amniotic fluid that surrounds the baby, intramuscularly, or as a vaginal pessary. The drug encourages an early delivery of the fetus by causing contractions. A significant number of abortions carried out by the use of Prostaglandin result in live births. Consequently, in more recent years, doctors have added a poison to the drug to ensure that the fetus is delivered dead. The complications for this method of abortion are similar to those of saline abortion.

5. Surgical method
In surgical abortions, a fetus is removed in a way identical to that of a Caesarean section, the only difference being that for an abortion, the fetus is given a sufficient anaesthetic to ensure that it is born dead. If it is born alive, the fetus is placed to one side and allowed to die. Peritonitis is a possibility with this form of abortion, and it is possible that in future pregnancies the woman's scar will rupture. There is also an increased risk of thrombosis and of having a pulmonary embolism with this method of abortion.

melissa

04-02-2008, 12:18 AM

usj27 resident, can i know who r u pls? r u a doctor??? cz sounds like u know alot of thing :)

USJ27Resident

04-02-2008, 12:45 AM

usj27 resident, can i know who r u pls? r u a doctor??? cz sounds like u know alot of thing :)

Nahhh! NOT a doctor.... :)

.... something [knowledge] that rubbed off from my mother... who happens to be a nurse...

.... used to volunteer in hospitals as well.

I guess it comes with the territory! :)

kokomo

05-02-2008, 05:05 PM

Wahhh .. buddy, your post on the medical research here is freakingly long. Hehehe .. could have just provide the link to read it.

All I knoe abortion is bad for women; kill the innocent & scarred for life with the memories of it.

Kittycat

07-02-2008, 11:32 AM

Dear mantis..I guess by now ur gf must be around 10-11 weeks pregnt now(if she hasn't gone for the 'procedure') yet. Well, if she hasn't done anythin yet, pls consider carrying d baby to term & then decide..If u guys cant look after d baby then consider givin up 4 adoption. Let abortion b ur very last option..there are risks & side effects of abortion - pain, hemorrhage, infection, guilty feeling as well. Babies are God's gift 2 us human, I see babies evryday & made me always wonder at these miracles - they're just beautiful. Anyway, if ur gf has done IT, well, I'm not one to preach but b xtra, xtra careful next time. There are lots of ways to prevent pregnancy.

LMei

10-02-2008, 10:44 PM

Hi Mantis, you mention that she miss her period for 2 months. Have she tested to confirm her pregnancy? I missed my period for 2 months before and I had a friend who missed hers for 4 months. But it's all because of stress...

melissa

21-02-2008, 02:26 AM

hi Mantis, can i know how old is ur gf???? r u really sure that she is getting pregnant??? did u buy any pregnant kit to test it??? or go for a check up???? Pls do not abort the baby plsss.... it is very sinful to do so and it can be very dangerous sometime for the pregnant woman.... If there is anything need help just ask....

tsd

21-02-2008, 04:15 AM

abortion is murder, an unborn child is a human... just like any of us.

Dont do it, u will regret for the rest of your life. Once done, cannot be undone.

not only that, it also put your gf in great danger and may suffer for the rest of her life with health and mental problems.

If you cant afford the baby, just let others take care of it. There are probably thousands of very rich people out there childless, dying to get their hands on your baby. I am sure these people will take very good care of your baby and they will ensure that your gf will get the best treatment throughout the pregnancy.

Its up to you to pick who and what they can offer your gf and the baby.

siew.wai

21-02-2008, 10:39 PM

maybe the heartless mantis already successful persuade his gf to do abortion.

a guy will only ask his gf to do abortion is when he do not love or no intention to married their gf.

Gals out there, when ur bf asked u to do abortion, you can see clearly actually how he care of you. He will never think about ur health matter. also killing doesnt a matter to him. After u do the abortion, few months later, he might abort u.

acidulous

22-02-2008, 10:29 PM

I personally feel that whether to abort or not it is up to the girl. To bash the guy for coaxing the girl to abort without knowing the detail of the problem itself is not right.

"Let him who is without sin cast the first stone"

lilifjp

28-02-2008, 03:58 PM

2008/02/07

Abandoned babies: There are more humane alternatives
By : S.I.B., Kuala Lumpur

Email to friend Print article Share

THE body of a newborn was found behind a restaurant in Bandar Puteri, Puchong, recently ("Body of dead newborn found" - NST, Feb 5). Her head had been crushed by a car tyre.

This is a complete outrage. I simply cannot believe that a human being can do that to another.

This has to stop and the authorities must hunt down the perpetrators at all cost just as earnestly as they are hunting for the lost child, Sharlinie Mohd Nashar.

Here, I appeal to all potential unwed parents.

If you conceive a child and he or she is unwanted, please do not kill the child. You can leave the child with a note at the doorstep of an orphanage, a temple, a mosque, a church or even the home of the local community leader.

You have already made one mistake having an unwanted child. Don't compound that by becoming a child murderer. Your child may be adopted by thankful childless couples.
Share

lilifjp

28-02-2008, 04:07 PM

"Let him who is without sin cast the first stone"
Dear Acidulous,

Many People Without Major Sins, Have tried to Cast "Life Boats" to save the unborn baby, pregnant girl & the "frightened boyfriend".

It is stories like the one above that breaks our hearts.

Do you think I need to know details of their problems to save a baby ? For this case it is a fully developed, healthy and born safely Baby Girl - only to be cruelly thrown in a rubbish bin and run over by a car ?

Touch your heart and ask yourself, have you done anything at least to lend a hand ?

Yes, I definately would like to bash a few cases of the teenage guys that I have met. They think they are Not Responsible for creating a baby. They think they can easily get new girlfriends.

We can only hope that the couples will come forward. There are many people who would like to baby sit the child until the 'know how to do it parents' graduate. But sadly, 90% knows where to find the illegal abortion clinics.

lilifjp

28-02-2008, 04:22 PM

To bash the guy for coaxing the girl to abort without knowing the detail of the problem itself is not right.

1. This baby is not Mine. * Do a DNA test, if the baby is not yours, you can give it up for adoption.
2. I use a condom, so the baby is not mine. * Condom do leaks. Only 99% safe to prevent a pregnancy. Most likely, the baby is yours.
3. My girlfriend took Prevention Pills, the baby is not mine. * Prevention Pills can cause Ectopic Pregnancy. Most likely the baby is still yours.
4. My girlfriend sleeps with alot of other guys. * So, what's the problem ?
5. My parents objects to our friendship. * We are not forcing you to get married. Just spare the baby and get married later if you are still together in 3 years time.
6. We are of a different religion background. * Huh ? So, why are you both jumping in the sack ?
7. I have a government scholarship. * Wow & you are also smart enough to create a baby. Who said you cannot go for your exams in your pregnant state ?
.
.
.
.

What ever reasons the couple might have, just spare the baby. In today's time, it is the next right thing to do.

You got no excuses, why don't any of you list it down so that we can help you solve your problems ?

acidulous

29-02-2008, 04:31 AM

Lili, I agree that baby should be given a chance once they are born. But my point here is about pregnancy state (about 20 weeks gestational period). Nothing more than that.
DOn't tell me that it is a life we are killing. No doubt i believe that it is alive... but what is life for you. Is it the 1st heartbeat or the slightest hint of perception...

I believe in giving everyone no matter what their family, social or economic background a second chance at least in term of healthcare. Abortion is always being seem as a tool of evil. Accident do happen. Nobody is perfect. The main thing here is education.

If the affected female decided to abort then so be it. She definitely have consider it greatly. In the end of the day it is not you that are going to live with it. It is the mother who will forever live with the fact. Rather than have the baby born and suffer uncertainty in the life. Can you guarantee that you can ensure the unwanted baby will have adequate care? Can you make sure that they will grow out to be a fine individual? Can you be sure that the unwanted baby will grow out and be grateful for being alive? Nobody will know the answer to that.

Would you rather to have abortion being made illegal then? or hard to obtain? Would you rather them go through the 'back-lane abortionist'? Instead of losing a life we are talking about 2 lives at stakes.

lilifjp

29-02-2008, 01:38 PM

... But my point here is about pregnancy state (about 20 weeks gestational period). Nothing more than that...

I believe in giving everyone no matter what their family, social or economic background a second chance at least in term of healthcare...

.....Can you guarantee that you can ensure the unwanted baby will have adequate care? Can you make sure that they will grow out to be a fine individual? Can you be sure that the unwanted baby will grow out and be grateful for being alive? Nobody will know the answer to that.

....Would you rather them go through the 'back-lane abortionist'? Instead of losing a life we are talking about 2 lives at stakes....
Dear Acidulous,

I believe it is cruel to abort when a heartbeat has been detected. The baby is trying to live/survive.

There is no guarantee that anyone will be a thief or rogue trader in the future (Blue collar crime). Or anyone can be so lucky like Donald Trump. :)

Perhaps, I have experienced the positive side of adopted cousins that I believe it is much better for adoption instead of going under the knife.

Definately, each adopted child will ask why their natural mother gave them away especially when they are 12 yrs old & above. It is only through love & care & patience of the adopted parents that these kids will understand once they have their own baby to take care.

My adopted cousins have also adopted kids from orphanage once they got married. Some even have mixture of biological & adopted kids - like the Brangeline couple..... Everyone is ok.

I am not a Policy Maker. Abortion is illegal in Malaysia.

I am just a volunteer that can do a tiny part to let the pregnant teenager know that there is such a place to seek shelter in Selangor. In fact we are so closeby....

acidulous

29-02-2008, 04:00 PM

It is true that most of the children born out of wedlock have to suffer the unnecessary mental anguish. I too condone the idea of neglecting the baby after it have been born. After all we are talking about a human being that have potential to do great thing in life.

I guess you lean toward more of 'pro-life' idea while I lean toward the 'pro-choice' idea. The main thing in this issue is not condemning the couple that decide to abort but rather educate them so this will not occur again.

Abortion is not illegal in Malaysia. It is legal up to the 1st trimester of the pregnancy (12-14 weeks of pregnancy) and must fulfill one of the 3 criteria or more if applicable:
Abortion is consider in 1st trimester if:

1. there is a danger to the mother's life
2. there is a danger to the mother's physical health
3. there is a danger to the mother's mental health

In the end I still believe that education is the answer to all the problems surrounding the 'abortion' issue.

lilifjp

29-02-2008, 07:07 PM

Dear Acidulous,

Are you a medical doctor who support that abortion should be legalised in Malaysia ?

Yes, it is true that terminating a pregnancy is possible, if & only if the situation is of danger to the mother & baby.

1. danger to the mother if the baby is formed outside of the womb. Or if it is ectopic pregnancy.
2. if the case is a rape case.
3. if the fetus is defective.
4. if the baby heart beat has stopped and the baby has died in the womb.

Other than the above, most of the abortions were carried out on healthy mothers with healthy living babies.

Please imagine, the doctors are inducing a baby alive if the baby is 5 or 6 months old, and the baby is gasping for air to try to breath.

At 14 weeks, the doctors are cutting up alive a baby's hand, legs etc.
Isn't it worse ? :(

acidulous

29-02-2008, 11:45 PM

Lili I am sure you know there is always a conflicting opinion when it come to 'abortion' issue. The examples that you used here are all the most extreme cases. I dont promote abortion nor I condone it. I still held firmly to my believe that everyone entitle to make their own choices. If it bad then educate them. If it is for a good reason support them all the way. There is no point trying to make those that choose abortion to feel bad about their decision. In the end they themselves will know what is the best for them.

USJ27Resident

01-03-2008, 02:16 PM

It is true that most of the children born out of wedlock have to suffer the unnecessary mental anguish. I too condone the idea of neglecting the baby after it have been born. After all we are talking about a human being that have potential to do great thing in life.

I guess you lean toward more of 'pro-life' idea while I lean toward the 'pro-choice' idea. The main thing in this issue is not condemning the couple that decide to abort but rather educate them so this will not occur again....

1. eh? condone? :eek: i do hope that was a typo error !!

2. is this issue about condemning.... :confused: what about pro-choice?? does the baby that was conceived by "mistake" have a "choice" ... to see the light of day or be sliced/diced in a womb...

please la... nobody is preaching here... just (as you have aptly put it) "educating" them what ACTUALLY happens in an abortion procedure and the alternative choice they have... at the end, they will make their choice - and live with it...

*peace*

tsd

01-03-2008, 06:39 PM

all those people talk about giving people choice to make abortion, does the baby have a choice ? what crime does this featus/baby do to deserve a dealth panalty ?

although the child is yet be seen walking or crying outside his/her mothers womb... he or she is already a human being just like you and me. Abortion is MURDER.. We are talking about ending the life of another human being. Murder of a innocent defenceless child.

USJ27Resident

02-03-2008, 12:46 AM

all those people talk about giving people choice to make abortion, does the baby have a choice ? what crime does this featus/baby do to deserve a dealth panalty ?....

Totally agree with you... what I have been saying all along...

acidulous

02-03-2008, 11:56 AM

Put it this way... Everyone have their own opinion on everything...

lilifjp

02-03-2008, 01:12 PM

I believe in giving everyone... Accident do happen. Nobody is perfect. The main thing here is education.

Dear Acidulous,

We are listening to you now. If we are looking into education / educating the abortionist :-

1.) how are we going to find them to educate them ?
2.) do I need to go from school to school, lecture 20 mins on the presentation slide about abortion ?
3.) some of these girls are 21 and above (most likely in college), it will be difficult to educate some one who thinks they know more than us... :eek:
4.) some are working adults ( 1st or 2nd year of working). Do i have to go office to office to do this educating ?
5.) the person who contribute the sperms are the guys. So, we have to make sure the guys are aware too :confused:

I will appreciate a good work plan from you. I am sure we can go ahead and make your plans work if the victims involved care to listen.

For me, the major advertisements for 'Tak Nak' - is a total failure. Waste of tax payer's money.

It will not be fair to make Civics/ Sex Education an exam subject in school as I feel 90% of the school girls & boys are good and they are virgins until they finish Form 6. Why punish everyone when only a handful of students are involved ?

Don't talk about the drop outs or runaways from homes, they are not in the school at all. How to get the message across ?

Please give us your workable plans.

applelim84

04-03-2008, 01:09 PM

i'm new here...n i would appreciate if someone could provide me with the contacts of the mentioned clinics....

Good Guy

04-03-2008, 04:34 PM

i'm new here...n i would appreciate if someone could provide me with the contacts of the mentioned clinics....
Hi applelim84,
Welcome to this site. With Auntie Lili by our side, a lot of problems have been solved. There is always a choice: at first it seems difficult, but with willing hands to help like Auntie Lili, all is not lost. When we have genuine moral support, we will be able to make rational decision for the good of all.
For a start, what we need is honest and caring dialogue. :)

acidulous

05-03-2008, 05:31 AM

I have no definite plan really for now. I am not even in Malaysia to even begin with. I am somewhere in the west. But if you want to know what my plan it will begin with a change in the school's curriculum. Sex education should begin early on. Perhaps somewhere around the age of 13. The subject should be teach openly and student should be expected to participate in an active discussion. The teacher should not brush aside the subject or even feel shy or reluctant to teach it. The more they know and the more they understand what is the consequence of it they will be more cautious. Parents also have to play a proactive role rather than just brush it aside. The thing with Malaysia's parents (majority) and other countries in the SEA is the reluctance to talk about "bird and bee".

The public should also be educated with a variety of contraception that is available for them such as condom (this one is commonly enough), oral contraceptive pill, depot injection, diaphragm and IUCD. And also made aware of the 'Morning After' pill so that abortion can be avoided. This can be included in part of the school sex education.

The gov. should also set up a public sexual health clinic. The purpose of this clinic is to offer advice and also confer any type of treatment related to sexual health with anonymity.

I am sure most of the school have some form of sexual education with a varying degree of success. If all of these primary prevention fail then perhaps secondary prevention that is to offer advice. A dedicated phone line or a support group should be widely made known about so the affected individual know where to find for help instead of randomly getting an advice through the net or friends.

Last but not least is to stop 'labeling' an individual as 'pervert', 'unfaithful', or any negative remarks. These remarks will only deter them from coming forward to find help.

lilifjp

05-03-2008, 03:27 PM

i'm new here...n i would appreciate if someone could provide me with the contacts of the mentioned clinics....
Dearest Apple,

I believe by now, you would already have the name of the clinic.

If you have not done it yet, please think about the option of carrying the baby to full term.

Sometimes, we might be unlucky to encounter boyfriends that are useless. Sometimes, the right kind of man who will take care of you have not appear yet in your life. Sometimes, due to conflict of character - that guy just walk out. There will be alot of reason for a bf/gf or even husband & wife to split.

But when a baby is formed, it is another individual. Give this baby a chance. Most likely, this baby that you are carrying is meant to fill up a life of laughter, happiness & tears for a couple who is praying hard for a baby now.

Alot of things in life, you cannot explain it now. This is the moment for you to make at least one correct option. The option to give a child to a family that are ready to raise a child.

We have a shelter in Puchong who takes in pregnant girls and we will take care of you until confinement time. In case, after the baby is born and you change your mind to keep the baby, we will be most happy to help you.

There is also a Muslim shelter in USJ which has the same concept.

I know you must be very determine to solve your problem, but if you have any tiny winy bit of hope, please contact us at any time. We are here to help you.

lilifjp

05-03-2008, 03:38 PM

Last but not least is to stop 'labeling' an individual as 'pervert', 'unfaithful', or any negative remarks. These remarks will only deter them from coming forward to find help.

Ooops.... sorry.

I just couldn't help it ! I just label some guys out there as useless.

I just do not know how to term a person who walks out of a relationship when the guy find out about the girlfriend's pregnancy. :eek:

applelim84

05-03-2008, 08:07 PM

Dearest Apple,

I believe by now, you would already have the name of the clinic.

If you have not done it yet, please think about the option of carrying the baby to full term.

Sometimes, we might be unlucky to encounter boyfriends that are useless. Sometimes, the right kind of man who will take care of you have not appear yet in your life. Sometimes, due to conflict of character - that guy just walk out. There will be alot of reason for a bf/gf or even husband & wife to split.

But when a baby is formed, it is another individual. Give this baby a chance. Most likely, this baby that you are carrying is meant to fill up a life of laughter, happiness & tears for a couple who is praying hard for a baby now.

Alot of things in life, you cannot explain it now. This is the moment for you to make at least one correct option. The option to give a child to a family that are ready to raise a child.

We have a shelter in Puchong who takes in pregnant girls and we will take care of you until confinement time. In case, after the baby is born and you change your mind to keep the baby, we will be most happy to help you.

There is also a Muslim shelter in USJ which has the same concept.

I know you must be very determine to solve your problem, but if you have any tiny winy bit of hope, please contact us at any time. We are here to help you.

dear aunty lili,

1st n foremost i would like to thank u very much for your support and encouragement..

i had went for a thorough check and apparently i'm nt in good health condition for this baby...with some advise frm the doctor i have the option to abort the baby legally...

i m now hospitalised and will be doing the surgery tomorrow....have to start fasting now and am very afraid now s i dunno wat i'll b facing tomorrow....

lilifjp

05-03-2008, 11:30 PM

Dearest Apple,

OK. Take care. Glad you gave us an update.

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

USJ27Resident

06-03-2008, 12:12 AM

Ooops.... sorry.

I just couldn't help it ! I just label some guys out there as useless.

I just do not know how to term a person who walks out of a relationship when the guy find out about the girlfriend's pregnancy. :eek:

SPINELESS SALTED CHICKEN? :p

USJ27Resident

06-03-2008, 12:15 AM

i had went for a thorough check and apparently i'm nt in good health condition for this baby......

dear dear applelim84,

just hope everything turns out well,.. you take care of your health for now...

acidulous

06-03-2008, 07:36 AM

applelim84

06-03-2008, 03:31 PM

hi aunty lily & usj27resident,

i have went through the process n m fine now resting at home....the process took less than an hour but the hour feels like a life time to me lying on the steel bed watching the 2 by 4 ceiling and lights above me....let tis b a lesson learnt n i sure will b wise about the nx man i choose....

lilifjp

06-03-2008, 10:25 PM

Dear Apple,

I am sorry to know that you are going through the trauma alone.

Pregnancy is suppose to be a moment of joy for any ladies because at the end of the hardship, we will be able to take home a cute little baby to pamper.

Having said that, I am glad that you went to a proper hospital for help and you are moving on. I believe you and I pray that you will one day find a nice husband that will pamper you till old age & will always take good care of you.

SunwayK

06-03-2008, 11:15 PM

I am surprised that no one is screaming MURDER, MURDER, MURDER here.

Or are the protagonists saying some fetus has more rights than others............just like what our politicians are preaching.

USJ27Resident

06-03-2008, 11:56 PM

I am surprised that no one is screaming MURDER, MURDER, MURDER here....

Look buddy, the girl made a mistake - and she's made a decision. The least we can do is to advise her what is gonna happen when she goes through the procedure... in the end, she decides. Who are we to scream murder, as you've said...

If she had decided to keep the pregnancy, well... I am sure she would have gotten all the help she would have to keep the pregnancy. And then what... to go through another trauma and heartache to GIVE AWAY her flesh and blood through adoption? Not knowing if she'd ever see her child again... :(

It is easier to judge and condemn someone than to find solutions...

Me :( thinks she's gone through enough and paid the price through her decisions that she's taken.

Or are the protagonists saying some fetus has more rights than others............just like what our politicians are preaching.
Now since when, does fetuses = political ties??? :rolleyes: Lets keep POLITICS and POLITICIANS out of this...

Hypothetically speaking, would you like to let us know what you would do if you ( or your girlfriend?, if you are a guy. ) got pregnant.... whilst being unemployed and without a proper home [no need to add other factors such as age, race and religion]

SunwayK

07-03-2008, 09:16 AM

Fren, my statement was made in light of what was said here and other similar rhetorics. I do not agree with people who scream MURDER without knowing the facts of the individual.

.... Abortion is MURDER.. We are talking about ending the life of another human being. Murder of a innocent defenceless child.
My point - every female should have a choice as it is their body and scientifically, the fetus is living of its host and the host has the right to decide. AppleLim84 decides and that is her choice and people, should not let religion cloud their judgement and spit MURDER here and there in this thread.

Hypothetically speaking, I would let the female decide.
Religion aside, I do agree with what Acidulous has been saying, pro-choice - just in case you are still unclear on what my point is.

lilifjp

07-03-2008, 10:37 AM

My point - every female should have a choice...
Base on the info given by some of the cases, they said that the doctor has certified the mother of the fetus is not healthy. In fact from this forum itself, I have encountered several pregnant girls who claim that.

Every option to save the fetus has been given. Free baby sitting, free diaper, free doctor check up, free boarding, free counselling,......

There is no point to add salt to the wound when the abortion has taken place.

Sometimes, while communicating with the pregnant girl, the girl may have miscarried from 6 weeks to 14 weeks time frame. They miscarried naturally.

Let me share with you a true story. In year 2005, I found out a 20 year old girl got pregnant. Brought her to a doctor, doctor said maybe ectopic because unable to detect the baby sac in the womb. We have to wait a few more days to scan again.

During that few days, she was full of guilt and going to break down anytime due to the fact that she might lose one fallopian tube.

We prayed and the baby moved into the womb and it is considered a normal pregnancy. Then we contacted her mother and we sort out the situation. She was supposed to registered her marriage first and then have a wedding after the birth of the baby.

But in between - her mother changed her mind and brought her daughter to have an abortion. I did not know about it until it happen a few days later. What can I do ? Nothing. I cried for a healthy baby girl that was aborted.

But I contacted the girl and told her that I hold no grudge against her decision. If she knew of any other girl that needs help, she can contact me again.

Ironically, the same girl got pregnant again after just 3 months and this time she was carrying twins. I have decided to tell her, I will adopt both her twins since her own mother was against her pregnancy. After spending so much time and doctor's check up. She lost her twins at 12 weeks. For this 2nd pregnancy, she was having spotting all the time. And finally, when she had heavy bleeding she was admitted to a hospital.

Bottom line is, we need to be more compassionate.

SunwayK

07-03-2008, 11:11 AM

...Bottom line is, we need to be more compassionate.
Yes, agreed...........and please send a message to all who shout MURDER when people come into this thread seeking clinics to help them with the choice that they have made. Or like you say, don't add salt to the wound.

lilifjp

07-03-2008, 11:21 AM

..........and please send a message to all who shout MURDER when......

Dear SunwayK,

If you have personal contact with these teenagers, you know Some of them are plain MURDER !

The scary part is - they can laugh about it. It gives me goose pimples sometimes when I deal with them.

siew.wai

07-03-2008, 07:50 PM

hi lilifjp,

no point to explain as those who reply u and against you are a GUY.
they just enjoy few min of love making pleasure. and not whole life responsibility.

They have to protect themselves.

USJ27Resident

07-03-2008, 08:53 PM

Religion aside, I do agree with what Acidulous has been saying, pro-choice - just in case you are still unclear on what my point is.

Ok..ok... I get your point... there always two side to a coin....

but, sadly - the only 'person' that don't have a choice... is the fetus ... :(

Lili... you have my number, call me. please. :)

SunwayK

07-03-2008, 09:04 PM

Lilifjp, USJ27 - don't get me wrong. I salute both of you for helping AppleLim84 and I have nothing but contempt for those who harass their partners to abort.

It's the self-righteous who speaks of nothing but bullcrap that I spit upon. There's one born everyday in usj.forum who makes silly random comments with a burning desire to let everyone know that they are stupid.

USJ27Resident

07-03-2008, 09:34 PM

There's one born everyday in usj.forum who makes silly random comments with a burning desire to let everyone know that they are stupid.

LoL.... quote of the week!! :p

applelim84

08-03-2008, 08:13 AM

no one wants to abort their own flesh n blood if given the choice.....i had thought of keeping the baby..with a 3k income i suppose i'm able to afford the baby...but when i went for a check up...the doctor say i'm nt in good health...my body is too weak n i was spotting n i feel extreme pain in my tummy...the doctor said i could continue having the baby but it's not advisable because i have high chances of having a miscarriage...after i know...i dunno y but tears jus keep flowing...i could do nothing but to make a painful decision after deciding to keep the baby....throughout the nite in the hospital while waiting for the surgery to take place i could only lie there holding my tummy knowing there's a life in there that i'm going to end....i can only pray to god to forgive me for making this decision....
the feeling of lying there n the doctor comes n tell u its ur turn...having to lie on the steel bed n being pushed into the operation theatre n the lights above u....its just too much for me to have to go through again...mayb none of u will understand n see me as a murderer in ur eyes....i'm fine wit tat...s long s in my heart i know tat i luv my baby jus s much s how others luv their kids.....n the baby will have stand a place in my heart...

jianwei85

08-03-2008, 02:19 PM

I am surprised that no one is screaming MURDER, MURDER, MURDER here.

Or are the protagonists saying some fetus has more rights than others............just like what our politicians are preaching.

sunwayk..i think i jz managed to get wat ur trying to say which is: Surprisingly no bystanders are screaming murder murder murder for abortion choice that are made regardless with a valid reason or not! (steoreotyping?)

was appalled earlier with that murder,murder,murder statement n wanted 2 shoot u all the way to the moon..sorry ya.. :rolleyes:

ginaphan

08-03-2008, 04:18 PM

Dear applelim84,

My heart goes to you. I pray that you can find peace in your decision. Your situation is very different. Nobody should see you as a murderer. Please don't look at yourself as a murderer.

When I lost my babies before term many years ago, the doctor told me that the babies would probably have not survived. My first two pregnancies were terminated by a misabortion - a natural process. I take comfort knowing that they are with God, not having to bear the difficulties of life.

Please take care of yourself. Take care of your health. God-willing, He will bless you with a healthy baby. Don't be frozen in the now. The baby will always be in your heart. It's OK not to forget the baby. But carry on living. You owe it to your future babies.

I have 3 kids now aged 14, 12 and 10.

lim275

10-03-2008, 04:27 PM

irisbaggins

10-03-2008, 04:35 PM

yvonnefoong

12-03-2008, 01:52 AM

Well, I don't think she expected herself to be unsuitable. Moreover, maternal instincts can be so strong, master of all hopes and dreams. Ah, another miracle of God.

qisqai75

18-03-2008, 01:37 PM

As a newbie to this forum, i'd like to convey how deeply greatful i am knowing that theres just so many of you that are just so helpful. I was a victim of rape and had a child. After much bashing and criticism from every single person i know, i decided to go through the hardship and pains of labor. My baby girl is 10 now and she lives in Sabah with a family which had longed for a child for more than 10 years as the mrs was unable to conceive due to medical problems. They have showered my girl with love and care and have given everything a child would want. There are times when we feel so lost, alone and even suicidal, but theres always hope, kindness and love just waiting for us . It depends on which path we choose to go too. Good luck and stay safe to all

lilifjp

19-03-2008, 01:01 AM

They have showered my girl with love and care and have given everything a child would want. There are times when we feel so lost, alone and even suicidal, but theres always hope, kindness and love just waiting for us . It depends on which path we choose to go too. Good luck and stay safe to all
Dearest Qisqai75,

Your post is so heart warming. ((((( A big hug to you )))))

It takes a very strong person to be able to go through the trauma that you went through & survive. It is also such a lovely feeling that you know you did the right thing & gave your little girl a life & a chance to be loved and to give love to a grateful couple.

Your little girl will always be a part of you. She will appreciate one day what you have sacrificied for her.

God will blessed you abundantly and I pray that you will find happiness & all your dreams will come true. I believe we cannot erase the past. I am at loss for words to comfort you.

I believe things happens for a reason & if we choose the right path, there will be blessings at the end of our journey.

You take care too and I would love to have coffee with you someday.

Hugs from ; Li Li

melissa

21-03-2008, 02:31 AM

Dear applelim84,

I feel sorry about what had hapenned to you...

So hope that you can have enough rest... and do take good care of yourself and

take good care of your health....

God will always be there for you! He is willing to help you anything!!! :) ;)

Stay cool... And Stay happy and cheerful everyday ! ! :)

lilifjp

28-03-2008, 11:29 PM

applelim84

01-04-2008, 08:56 PM

all my gratitude goes to the ppl tat provided me support n care throughout this tough period.....all of u r really helpful n i appreciate it very much...

i'm fine now though still feeling upset at times....but i'll be fine...

lilifjp

05-04-2008, 01:13 AM

Hi everyone,

I find that the thoughts of chanlilian on the issue of RM 2M law suit hillarious.

Please check this website ;

http://www.chanlilian.net/

mitosblog

05-04-2008, 02:57 PM

easiest way wear a condom and she be alright!

melissa

07-04-2008, 12:46 AM

Aunty Li li, Nice poem!!!
hehe...

Bulldoggie

28-04-2008, 04:22 PM

Dear Applelim84,

Don't be sad. Everything will gonna be alright. Sad to say my 1st baby was aborted due my young age and an irresponsible Ex-bf and 2nd one was aborted due to ectopic pregnancy, thanks to the morning after pill (Pls take note here, ladies!)

And thank GOD for my third successful pregnancy, now my daughter is almost 1 yr old, a very cheerful and healthy baby.... :)

No matter what happened, you still need to move on....who knows, a better life could be just waiting for you ahead. Take care.

Warmest regards,
Bulldoggie

lilifjp

07-05-2008, 02:01 PM

This message is meant for someone who wrote to me on 2nd May 2008,

I have replied two PM (Private Message) to you but the messages are not read.

I know and understand what you are going through. In my opinion, when you have doubts, it is better to have a 3D scan for the baby's internal organs. I would highly recommend that ; so that you can have a confirmation of your baby's condition.

I have put my handphone#, so please give me a call.

I know that you are very distressed now, but if you have terminated a pregnancy with a healthy baby, you might feel grief for the rest of your life. The pain of losing a baby is very painful and I do not want you to suffer from it.

It does not cost much for a 3D scan. We can help you with that. If the baby is found to be having birth defect, many gynae will be able to do a D&C for you.

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

makeupgirl

25-06-2008, 04:55 PM

It's the self-righteous who speaks of nothing but bullcrap that I spit upon. There's one born everyday in usj.forum who makes silly random comments with a burning desire to let everyone know that they are stupid.

LOL... that's right SunwayK. Don't know whether can we ask moderator to do anything with these comments... they don't really help out the people in need here. I feel mad :mad: they just use this place to debate with people who is actually in the field helping out (like Aunt Lily, etc) :eek:

On the other hand, I want to thank Aunt Lily and others who taking time to offer help, not everyone have the heart and time to do this. I can see from the thread that sometime you guys don't even get a thank you from those that you helped, and sometimes have to be very careful on wordings as they were so touchy/sensitive.

Salute to you all! :)

help

22-07-2008, 07:49 PM

anyone know any abortion clinic around kl, Pj or bangsar? URGENT ...

lilifjp

24-07-2008, 01:10 AM

Dear Help,

Can you please give me a call ? I think we seriously need to have a nice cup of tea and talk about this issue.

It is not difficult to find an abortion clinic around SJ or KL, but the long term effects on your girlfriend will be permanent.

It is very easy to say, get rid of the fetus now. But do you know the sadness your girlfriend have to endure ?

If your girlfriend is really not healthy, the fetus will naturally miscarry. But the odds are very high that both of you are very young and the fetus is very healthy and will survive the 9 months of pregnancy.

Don't force your girlfriend to do this. Give your girlfriend a chance to talk to a counsellor first.

Please check your PM and call me.

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

Good Guy

24-07-2008, 11:21 AM

Auntie Lili,

How do you know "Help" is a male?

Hello Help,

You can trust Auntie Lili. Just give her a call, and you will receive all the help you need.

Take care.

Pretzels

24-07-2008, 12:30 PM

:( dear auntie li li,
please help..i duno whether my gf pregnant d or not, normally she period on 23th of every months, today d 28..but still nt yet cum.
buy the test kit d, but hv't test yet. 1month 5 days period hvt cum , will get to test the result???
This was posted by help last july 07 :(
Help, pls do make a sacrifice to save your gf from further agony, if she's really pregnant this time, pls heed to aunti lili's advice and hopefully you'll do the right thing and spare your baby's little life..take good care.

SunwayK

25-07-2008, 06:38 PM

If one need to come back to this thread twice asking for help within a span of a year, obviously, the person like to help himself without consideration for the consequences.

indz

27-08-2008, 02:09 PM

online12793

27-08-2008, 08:29 PM

hi all! im new here. does anyone know if emergency contraception is provided in the hospital for rape victims? i mean if a victim is admitted or go to a hospital after a rape case, will she be given emergency contraception from the hosp?

Tell the hospital to give you the morning after pill,
you have got less than 48hrs to take it
or else it will be too late by then.

indz

27-08-2008, 10:37 PM

Tell the hospital to give you the morning after pill

does this mean the pill is only provided upon request?

lilifjp

27-08-2008, 11:56 PM

Dear Indz,

When did the rape happen ? Today ? Even if you eat the morning after pill, it might not work. In fact, it can cause other problems such as ectopic pregnancy or deformed babies.

If you or your friend got raped recently, do not go through this yourself. There are support groups who are willing to help you.

If the pregnant girl has an ectopic pregnancy, she could lose a fallopian tube. This is a dangerous condition and life threatening for the girl. It will also be a second trauma if this happens.

We have experience with rape victims who go through proper counselling, go through the pregnancy and gave up the baby for adoption.

Please do consider this option. Rape is very traumatic for any women.

lilifjp

28-08-2008, 12:04 AM

does this mean the pill is only provided upon request?
Dear Indz,

For a rape victim, you will need to lodge a police report regarding the rape. Do not shower. Bring your girlfriend and go to the nearest hospital, emergency and report the rape. They will assist you from there. It will be a long night. You need evidence against the person who did this to you.

Even if the rape happen a few weeks ago and now you suspect you are pregnant, you can still lodge a police report and request for the GH doctor to do a D&C for you for trauma caused by the rape.

indz

28-08-2008, 12:38 AM

wat's D&C?

lilifjp

28-08-2008, 01:58 AM

wat's D&C?
Dearest Indz,

First of all, thanks for asking questions. That means you are alright for this moment.

I belong to a group of volunteers who look after pregnant girls. We care about the mother & the child ( pregnant girl + the growing baby).

Normally, we would like to encourage the teenager to stay on the pregnancy and deliver the baby full term 9 months later. We will help you.

But if anyone encounter a rape situation, you are forced against your will. Emotionally, you are wreaked but we just want to make sure you are fine and will recover from your terrible experience.

I am not saying abortion is ok or not. I am saying that you have a choice.

I have alot of friends who married late and are trying for babies for many years. After early weeks of conception, the fetus is normally not stable. Some ladies might encounter miscarriage. That means either the fetus is not growing or no heart beat at all.

The gyne doctor will do a dilation and curettage (D&C) to remove the dead fetus. That means, the doctor will dilate your cervics (down there) and use a suction to remove fetus, umbilical cord or placenta).

Most girls experience some pain but the terrible trauma will be after the D&C. You feel empty and sad. Some girls experience extreme sadness and depression. Low self esteem and always blaming themselves for what happen.

There are many teenage girls have given birth. Alot of cases who gave up their babies for adoption continue on their studies and move on well.

Rape case are very few who keep on the pregnancy. But to give birth and if you know this baby is going to be given away to a nice couple who are praying very hard for a baby, normally the teenager will be relief. For me, I find that it is such a special blessing to give up a baby - for a grateful middle age couples.

Yes, you can request for a D&C if you have a confirmed pregnancy. Your doctor at the GH might give you some medications if your pregnancy is detected early and you are mentally not prepared to continue with this pregnancy.

Meantime, pray hard. Think about it. If you want to talk to me, please send me a Private Message. We can meet up as soon as you are ready.

Take care, Auntie Li Li

KJ08

06-09-2008, 02:20 PM

help.. i'm pregnant 5 weeks..
is medical abortion safe?? :(
where shld i go 2 get a safe abortion..?

Vixey

06-09-2008, 10:40 PM

Hi KJ,

I am sorry you have found yourself in this situation. It must be a very emotionally confusing and difficult time for you. Have you thought of the options you have and are you really sure that an abortion is the best solution? What about the father? Does he know you are pregnant?

I would be glad to talk to you and help you through this. Just pm me and I will give you my contact details. If you like we can talk through PM as well. I know it is difficult to share your thoughts and feelings to the whole world.

PM me. You are not alone this. There are people out here who are there to help.

If you choose not to PM me or to talk, I do understand. But I hope before you do go for an abortion, you have to know that there really is no "safe" abortion. You can rationalize that its just a clinical procedure and that after a day or two, your life will be back to normal and no one would ever need to know that you were pregnant.

I am sorry to say this but you will never be free from it. That's why it is important at this point to talk to people who can help you think. You can't do it on your own because right now you are driven by fear, confusion and desperation.

PM me KJ.

Hugs,
Vixey

riana1701

14-09-2008, 04:24 PM

A Poem For You

Why is it so hard for you to grab my hand ?
Why is it so cold you feel in your heart ?
Don’t you feel helpless and in despair ?
Don’t you know that I really care ?

Many a nights I have waited for your mail,
Tell me your doubts , Tell me your fears,
We’ll try to sort it out once you appear,
Come to us today, don’t cry alone in tears,

There are so many people lending a hand…
Why do you have to turn us away ?
Pick up the phone, call me today,
I will turn your nightmare into a beautiful day…

hye...
been a while already since i check out this forum...for those gals out there who r troubled rite now...trust me...u r not alone...i've been in this situation and i did seek help...now im almost 6 mths pregnant and i dun think life could have been better for my situation...i thot bout abortion before n i was scared but then i started seeking help and i found aunt lili...am truly greatful for her presence...really meant a lot...huhu....

melissa

14-09-2008, 09:01 PM

Hi! KJ
Im sad to hear that u r going for the abortion.
U can PM me if u need any help. I can help u....

qq75

17-09-2008, 02:02 PM

Hi. I understand that aunt lili is no longer posting here. Should she be reading this post, it would be great if she would reply to my PM once shes able to. Tq :)

riana1701

17-09-2008, 07:00 PM

dun worry qq75...she's still active in this forum...am sure she contact u as soon as she can...just try to PM her...

kennpjs

24-09-2008, 06:30 PM

i also have the same can pls help me?

milion thank thank

kennpjs

24-09-2008, 06:33 PM

i have the same problem can u pls advise pls
o tell me wat to do :confused:

Vixey

24-09-2008, 08:39 PM

You can PM me if you would like to talk.

LMei

25-09-2008, 09:44 AM

http://www.nst.com.my/Current_News/NST/Thursday/National/2359228/Article/index_html

qq75

26-09-2008, 04:06 PM

i have the same problem can u pls advise pls
o tell me wat to do :confused:
hope ure doing ok.
PM me if u need someone to talk too.
u can PM aunt lili too :)
take care

chemisgurl

08-10-2008, 11:06 AM

hi,
i'm 25 years old lady and i'm pregnant about 2 months. I love children but i have no choice since i'm not marry yet. Anyone can help me? I already took Postinor-2 but there's nothing happen....

Sugarfree

08-10-2008, 11:08 AM

talk to your boyfriend. have you tried doing that? is he aware that you're pregnant?

chemisgurl

08-10-2008, 11:15 AM

talk to your boyfriend. have you tried doing that? is he aware that you're pregnant?

he knew my situation...we are staying together. he's the one who cares about me during my pregnancy.i'm facing a very terrible moring sickness. we already discuss about this problem.Actually we are going to engage end of this year. If i keep this baby and 'nikah' suddenly it will invite curiousity to our parents. my parents doesn't prefer 'nikah gantung' and at the same time i'll attend for KPLI (which is i cannot pregnant as a condition)...

Sugarfree

08-10-2008, 11:57 AM

engaged? why? you should get married straightaway! i mean, if you love each other, why not get married?

teacherwong

08-10-2008, 09:16 PM

he knew my situation...we are staying together. he's the one who cares about me during my pregnancy.i'm facing a very terrible moring sickness. we already discuss about this problem.Actually we are going to engage end of this year. If i keep this baby and 'nikah' suddenly it will invite curiousity to our parents. my parents doesn't prefer 'nikah gantung' and at the same time i'll attend for KPLI (which is i cannot pregnant as a condition)...

my advice. if your conditions (especially financial) allowed, pls keep the baby as your are already 25 years old. About your KPLI, your are saying 'you will' attend it. so i assume that you be attending it next year, right? pls give a call to your teaching college ask for the procedure to postpone your couse, they allow you to postpone one time in your course.

chemisgurl

09-10-2008, 05:19 PM

engaged? why? you should get married straightaway! i mean, if you love each other, why not get married?

yeap dat's the best way but we are having a financial problem dat not allow us to get marry now...

thanks teacherwong,
if i can save this baby i'm the happiest person in this world :) ...i supposed to have kursus in teaching institute next year and during my course i cannot pregnant unless i will blacklisted by government. I have no choice...i already consulted with doctor and he suggest me if i want to abort i have to do now becoz there's no clinic willing to do it 3 months and above...

USJ27Resident

09-10-2008, 06:28 PM

I have no choice...i already consulted with doctor and he suggest me if i want to abort i have to do now becoz there's no clinic willing to do it 3 months and above...

No choice is a choice... its a choice that only you will have to live with... there are many other choices you could make... including doing something else other that KPLI...

Like what teacherwong said... couldn't you apply for an extension/leave... to start your course after the baby is born... If you cannot keep the baby, the least you could do is to give him/her up for adoption... that's a hard choice but better than an abortion...

teacherwong

09-10-2008, 08:50 PM

:) ...i supposed to have kursus in teaching institute next year and during my course i cannot pregnant unless i will blacklisted by government. ...

they will allow you to extend the course for once in your life time, pls call to Bahagian Pendidikan Guru (pls check via www.moe.gov.my).

chasus

15-10-2008, 09:18 PM

hi guys.. well after been thru all the pages.. quite lots of information we can shared here...

anyway.. me myself im having same problem too.. but mine.. my gf delayed her period about a week.. i asked her to get a home pregnancy test.. at 1st trial.. only the control line(i guess) visible .. and its quite relieved for me.

but on the 2nd trial... she took the test on early morning.. and the result 1 line is visible and the 2nd line is barely visible (cant really see it unless u look at it properly).. so is she really pregnant? and now im starting to worry bout it.

USJ27Resident

18-10-2008, 08:23 AM

... and now im starting to worry bout it.

Did you worry when you were "doing" it... :rolleyes:

Now own up to your responsibilities la... or you gonna go to Splitville! :rolleyes:

kennpjs

27-10-2008, 08:14 PM

if 4 n half month got any place to go?
really urgent.
is safe ah?

qq75

28-10-2008, 12:38 PM

if 4 n half month got any place to go?
really urgent.
is safe ah?
its already 4 1/2 half mth growing in the tummy ... wat more do u expect u can do??? :confused:

kennpjs

28-10-2008, 03:52 PM

but today my friend ask me go the clinic
the doc say can do o.
suprise lea.

Blue Jasmine

29-10-2008, 10:36 AM

but today my friend ask me go the clinic
the doc say can do o.
suprise lea.

kesian the baby ...four mth you can see his eyes and some simple body feature and his face...there is no difference than you killing another human. The only difference is the baby has no chance to defend itself. ...sorry to say that. God has entrusted this baby for you ...do u know how many that want a baby but cannot get. This is God blessing ...accept it and you will be blessed. Do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow has its own worry. Just believe....

chasus

30-10-2008, 06:20 AM

Did you worry when you were "doing" it... :rolleyes:

Now own up to your responsibilities la... or you gonna go to Splitville! :rolleyes:

i dun think u should being sarcastic here.. eventho mostly what all they wanna do in here is totally wrong.. but they seek for helps, information or a solution for them to overcome this and however, it is also necessary society in general to help them.

chasus

30-10-2008, 06:23 AM

if 4 n half month got any place to go?
really urgent.
is safe ah?

wah bro.. 4 n half month surely can do.. but i guess its quite late alrdy. anyhow. goodluck.

Kittycat

30-10-2008, 05:07 PM

I really hope that for those who are going for abortion due to 'carelessness' will be careful the next time round :( . I'm not trying to pass judgement here but before going for abortion, please spare some thought to the fetus - to me it's the same like killing another human being.. There are lots of contraceptive methods - pills, condoms, IUCD, injections, CI.. hm.. I won't suggest ovulation calendar as it's difficult to follow - I'm sure there's one that will suit a couple. For young, inexperienced couples, please, please find more info about contraception if you're not ready to become parents - internet kan ada.. 1st time dah buat salah, hopefully no repeats 2nd, 3rd time round.

dunno123

04-11-2008, 12:39 PM

I need some help here...
does any1 here know any abortion add???
I scare i might need it..
i'm just 20 and i still need to go overseas study....

melissa

04-11-2008, 02:15 PM

I need some help here...
does any1 here know any abortion add???
I scare i might need it..
i'm just 20 and i still need to go overseas study....

Hey! I just send a private message to u. Can u go n look at it pls.

Mrs A Tham

24-11-2008, 04:53 PM

My dear girl,
getting married does not need a big amount!! If both of you can be adult enough to play the game...moreover without precaution!! Why don't you both be human and adult enough to face the responsibility!! :mad:

OMG!! And you have the brains here to tell us you intend to further your studies!! I do not know what is going on in your head when you made the LIFE and this is a baby ...an outcome from both your love! I may not have read all the 30++ threads Q & A here but to me abortion when you are less than 2 months are still acceptable but 4 months!!!! Girl, the procedure is life threatening even to you now especially doing it at backlane clinics!!

At 20's, your knowledge of SEX and prevention is still like a primary kid!! Didn't they teach you in school long time ago?

Think properly! If both of you really do love each other, at this point you both have to be brave to face the parents. They will lecture and blow their whistle but outcome is both of you in the end is more likely to get their simpathy and support. BTW its their grandchild's life here!

For Heaven's sake, furthering studies 1 year later makes no different. You either fulfilled your ambition one year earlier or one year later. Put baby under yours/his parents care temporarily until you finished your studies.

Getting married is just signing a piece of paper!! If you have money then it's 300 guests to dinner in big restaurant! If not, its a nice quiet dinner with both families at home! What's the big deal of having a lot of money only can get married kinda thinking!

The most important thing here is whether there is support for you and him!!

I knew girls with situation worse than you, got pregnant and boyfriend ran away. They kept the baby with the help of Single Mother's Govt Welfare and work and study and now very successful and married. These girls truely gain respect! Do not run away from your mistakes, be brave enough to admit and do your best to make it better.

Look at Dr Chua...he did a mistake, brave enough to admit it. Rather than coverups... Sometimes the outcome is not as bad as expected!

Go for counselling, I believe there are members here that can help you as they are also volunteers for Single pregnant girls Home in USJ!

spongey

28-11-2008, 10:18 PM

lilifjp

01-12-2008, 09:13 AM

why want to abort?u can feel the love whn tht baby start kick u from inside,mayb u dun want it now but once u can feel she kick u for first time n once u see ur baby face,ull do anything to give her everything u could,
Dear Spongey,

Your reply is very cute.

But at early stage, after confirmation of the pregnancy with home pregnancy test kit; the baby is the size of a dot. Cannot feel any kicking yet. Only at about 12 weeks pregnancy, baby's tiny movement can be felt.

Most pregnancy were terminated at below 12 weeks. It is still a crime to terminate any pregnancy when any girl have tested positive for being pregnant. The baby is already starting to develop all the import organs after 4 weeks. :(

So, I urge all of you girls that are pregnant, please try to contact me or any of your religion centre or counselling centres for the correct help.

For the past few months, there are several emails from guys. I only want to talk to the pregnant girls. If the guys are not going to make the effort to give me the gf phone number or bring the gf to a proper gyne, I have nothing more to say .....

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

lilifjp

01-12-2008, 09:23 AM

melissa

02-12-2008, 03:19 PM

USJ27Resident

03-12-2008, 05:13 PM

i dun think u should being sarcastic here.. eventho mostly what all they wanna do in here is totally wrong.. but they seek for helps, information or a solution for them to overcome this and however, it is also necessary society in general to help them.

I was not being sarcastic to them... only to the manner of your post... :rolleyes:

Look... this is not the place to look for solutions to your mistake[s]. It she is pregnant - then you shud at least stand by her and own up to your responsibilites...

Eh? it is necessary for... society in general... to help who... help them for mistakes done by the irresponsible partner???

Might as well - ask the community to PAY for the abortions - since the partner [more often than not....] will CABUT !!

USJ27Resident

03-12-2008, 05:19 PM

I need some help here...
does any1 here know any abortion add???
I scare i might need it..
i'm just 20 and i still need to go overseas study....

dear... go to a doctor and get yourself checked first... don't jump the gun....

sometimes stress and other factors would delay your period - and when you're not sure, you might think that you ARE pregnant !!

even if you ARE... do seek help or guidance first before doing anything drastic... I have a colleague currently recovering from suicide attempt.. she "thought" she got pregnant* - and tried to end HER life with excess paracetamol... didn't work - but am pretty sure she'll remember the feeling of stomach lavage procedure... we are keeping the lid on it so that her family and employer doesn't know what had happened... managed to get the doctors to 'record' this incident as an appendicitis...

ps: she wasn't pregnant ... ;)

Mrs A Tham

05-12-2008, 02:37 AM

why want to abort?u can feel the love whn tht baby start kick u from inside,mayb u dun want it now but once u can feel she kick u for first time n once u see ur baby face,ull do anything to give her everything u could,

Hi Spongey,
I agree with lilifjp, by the time u can feel baby movement, it'll be too late for any thing to be done. But ofcoz I do not encourage abortion. To me, the love and bonding already started even b4 I can feel any kicking/punching! :) And yes, on the othr hand u r very right, when one can feel the movement, its like a miracle...its a gifted feeling that ONLY MOMMIES will know and daddy doesn't :rolleyes: I still remember when I felt my child kicking, it's like 5 months up...then on the 6th month I can feel bumps here and there and kinda feel like knees and elbows huh?

Mrs A Tham

05-12-2008, 02:45 AM

Premature baby means how many months is the baby?? So is the baby ok now?

Dear, a premie is one who is born below 36 weeks gestation and a full term babe are those of 40 weeks. Anything above 42 are over-due and have to be induced... Mine's also a premie came out to see the world at 31 weeks, borned 1.3kg+, now a healthy 3 1/2 year old. Babeies although born premie, if they are out after 36 weeks, their chances are very good. And premie babies are really tough fighters and needs alot of stimulation esp love, touch and voice of a mommy!

Mrs A Tham

05-12-2008, 02:55 AM

I am happy to announce that we have two babies born for the month of November 2008 :)

First baby was born mid Nov 2008, 3.5kg boy, Chinese and the baby will be with the mother.

Second case, baby was born last Saturday,29th Nov 2008. Premature and the baby is now in ICU. This 20+yr old mother is very brave. She has gone through alot and she is very determine to keep her baby. I have been with her for the past 7 months and her boyfriend is still blur...

To all those girls out there, if your boyfriend is still blurr with his future, you have to decide for yourself and your baby.

Have a lovely week....

Hugs from Auntie Li Li

Congrats to both mommies! And to the one with a premie, lots of love to her baby. Well, howz the baby now? When baby still in ICU, pls advice mommy to pump milk and put in freezer so that when baby out of ICU can pass milk to nurse to be fed to baby. When milk being transported to hospital, pls place in coolerbox.That's the best she can do for her baby for now. Mothers milk help give baby lots of antibodi..Ask her to try her best to frequent the ICU to stimulate the baby. Baby knows when mommy is around. Do not underestimate these small angels. They have been listening to your voice since developing hearing within the womb.
If she needs advice to take care of her premie baby, I am all hers to share.

lilifjp

14-12-2008, 12:08 AM

Dear Mrs Tham,

I have sent yr regards to the young mother. She is exhausted. Baby has been discharged from HKL yesterday. Now weighing 2.16kg. Always hungry & the young mummy is breast feeding.

Cost of delivery at HKL was RM70. Cost of ICU for two weeks was RM93.

I would like to inform all the young girls out there who are pregnant. This young 20+ girl carried a baby that has birth defect. His intestine was growing out of the stomach. The young mother after several sessions of crying & sharing could not abort the baby. Now the baby has been born, defect corrected via operations at HKL. And she is taking care of her baby now. She has gone through a life threatening experience.

If she could not have a heart to do an abortion, why are so many of you want to kill a baby at 4 months old pregnant ? :confused:

lilifjp

14-12-2008, 12:21 AM

I cannot understand so many of the girls I have spoken to for the past two years. Some are from this forum & some from referrals from friends in colleges.

Why are some of you so heartless ? Yes, I am really saying some of you girls here are heartless. You think that by disposing of your 1 month baby or 4 months baby is not a crime at all. You think that the baby is interfering with your career or your overseas studies.

Well, career could hold for a while until your baby is born. Definately, studies can be delay for one year until your baby is born. If you do not want your baby, please carry it to full term and give it to a childless couple.

Many college girls that I know did not graduate on time anyway. Either you fail some subjects and need to re-sit. Or you simply delay because you are too busy having fun & no time to study.

Alot of the college boys that I spoke to makes me vomit blood. You all said that you are an adult & knows what you are doing. But when really a confirm pregnancy happens, you said your girlfriend is cheap and maybe the baby is not yours. And both of you are also not sure if you want to spend the rest of your life with each other. :confused:

You want the community to help you ? How ? By paying your abortion bills ? How can we help you if you don't even want to bring your girlfriend to see a counsellor ?

We are still here in case, just a tiny hope if there are girls who are pregnant and could not go through the abortion process. For this type of girls out there, please send me a PM. We will not give up hope to help those who seek help.

USJ27Resident

14-12-2008, 04:48 PM

Many college girls that I know did not graduate on time anyway. Either you fail some subjects and need to re-sit. Or you simply delay because you are too busy having fun & no time to study.

Alot of the college boys that I spoke to makes me vomit blood. You all said that you are an adult & knows what you are doing. But when really a confirm pregnancy happens, you said your girlfriend is cheap and maybe the baby is not yours. And both of you are also not sure if you want to spend the rest of your life with each other. :confused:...

And sometimes we wonder how on earth, these kind of fellas qualify - to be admitted to these colleges... :rolleyes:

Lilifjp... don't sweat it... cos' it is no point helping those that don't know how to appreciate help and don't care enough about precious lives.... You just keep helping those that really WANT TO BE HELPED. :)

By the way - you've got PM...

Mrs A Tham

18-12-2008, 12:12 PM

[QUOTE=lilifjp]Dear Mrs Tham,

I have sent yr regards to the young mother. She is exhausted. Baby has been discharged from HKL yesterday. QUOTE]

Ooops! My mistake...posted in the other thread not knowing bb already discharged...

Mrs A Tham

18-12-2008, 12:29 PM

Aunty Lili,
I totally agree with you in all that you have writen up there. And to the young mommy, I respect her for keeping the baby..Well bb born with intestine outside esp premie is a birth defect but not one that cannot be help as I was at the premie ward in HKL before and mind you alot were born that way and all had the same op as hers I think to put them back in. Mine was diagnosed using sonograph at 20wks and found to be in danger of placenta previa, amniotic band syndrome and very hi risk of down syndrome but when he was born premie at 31 wks gestation, he was the sweetest thing I had ever known and I thanked GOD I made the right choice to keep him. He has got no birth defect and he is a normal boy now healthy and intelligent and a very fast learner. I was 37 when I had him and it was a pretty difficult pregnancy and if I were to terminate my pregnancy before, I may not be able to have a child anymore due to my age and fertility problems! I am happy now knowing I am a complete person with this child!
As the Malay says, "Anak pembawa reseki"...well mine sure does! Having a child will not slow you down. It's how you look at the scenerio that makes the different. To me, having this child actually pushes us forward!

rixie

29-12-2008, 09:32 PM

Hi, I stumbled upon this forum by accident and... (don't start shooting me please), co-incidentally, I have the same problem as many of those who came in here to get abortion clinic addresses. >.< unlike them (even though I really am pro-abortion in theory), I actually want to deliver mine and my boyfriend's baby and see him or her in the hands of an adoptive family since really, we don't have the means and ways to make sure we can support our studies and a baby at the same time (we're both 17).

And as many people would guess... I did not tell my family - their views are far too traditional. Frankly, I did not tell my boyfriend either, because his parents' view are the same as mine, and I don't want him to be shipped off somewhere I can't find because of this.

I believe I'm somewhere along three months now (since October), because for these three months, I did not have my period. I did not actually check with a pregnancy kit yet because, when I planned to get a pregnancy kit, I lost my wallet and phone - thus, I'm cashless. My eating habits remained the same, relatively, so no one realized this. Yet. (I actually had a very bad time when I kept vomiting, but I was also pretty ill at the time, so the doctors and my parents chalked it up to that.)

Right now, as I've mentioned, my eating habits remain the same, just the amount I take in has reduced - but not significantly. I also have a relatively active lifestyle, since I do take martial arts - taekwondo, to be specific, and in general I'm a hyper person. If I didn't have the small urges to vomit in the late afternoons/early evenings and lack of period, I'd think I was fine.

In March 2009, I'll be taking a degree course in Pyschology at Sunway University. The trouble I'm having here is that, while I really do want to give birth to this life and see him or her off in the arms of their adoptive parents, I'm having difficulties finding a place/room to rent while I go on with my studies.

I'm sorry for ranting here, and if there is a way to help me, please, do let me know. I do not want to destroy a life.

Much thanks in advance.

pucman

29-12-2008, 10:38 PM

I'm sorry for ranting here, and if there is a way to help me, please, do let me know. I do not want to destroy a life.

.

Never, ever kill a baby because there are terrible karma to it. There are lots of childless couples or single parents who want a baby.

Maybe Mrs Tham or other forummers has some further info. I know of Ti Ratana that adopts children until they can find suitable parents.

Their contact is here

Tel: 7988 1818

http://ti-ratana.org.my/v2/index.php?option=com_contact&Itemid=3

lilifjp

30-12-2008, 12:44 AM

I'm sorry for ranting here, and if there is a way to help me, please, do let me know. I do not want to destroy a life.
Dearest Rixie,

Thank you for writing about your plight in this forum. You have come to the right place and we can help you.

I am a volunteer with a single pregnant girls shelter in Puchong and I am also in contact with the muslim shelter in USJ 9.

You are only 17 years old but you are very kind & mature at your age. Since you have not seen a gyne yet, I have to meet up with you & take you to a proper doctor for your medical check up. The doctor will do a urine test & an ultrasound test to check if you baby is growing well in your womb. If you have missed you period for about 3 months, we can see a very strong heartbeat on the ultrasound scan. The doctor will show it to you.

You said you are short of cash. Don't worry. We will help you out with the medical check up cost.

I will send you a Private Message with my handphone number. Please check your messages by logging in on the top of this page.

Hugs from ; Auntie Li Li

lilifjp

30-12-2008, 12:53 AM

And as many people would guess... I did not tell my family - their views are far too traditional.

Dearest Rixie,

I do agree with you that Malaysian are very "old fashion & strict". When things happen to other people, they gossip about it. When things happen within the family, all things will be "havoc" at home.

Let's meet up & we can chat over a cup of milo. We will discuss about your family & see how we can sort things out.

For the 1st Trimester, the baby may not be stable. For a very strong, young & fit girl like you, if you are pregnant; most likely your baby will be healthy. But things might happen. You have not tested with the gyne yet. Maybe you are not pregnant after all. We do have a few cases that I follow up closely, the girls got the period after 3 months.

We can only conclude things after you see the gyne.

weny89

30-12-2008, 01:25 AM

Hi everyone, I've read many of the posts on these forum and pity those who has to go through abortion regardless of which side was at fault.I'm not sure whether I'm currently experiencing the same thing. I've recently came back from Singapore and was under stress as working experience with my aunt had me working about 13 hours in her office. Not to mention the stress from examinations in November.

My Bf and I have been having sex periodically but safely at the same time. We use condoms as frequent as we can. However, I have not had my period for about two months now. Since the end of October till now. Fortunately enough, I did not see or feel any of the pregnancy symptoms. I do not feel nausea, cramps, bloating and other symptoms stated on the internet and medical books.

During the start of the year when I went to Au, I also missed my period for two months. Is this normal due to the change in climate and living conditions? Not to mention I went on holiday to Chiang Mai as well.

If I were to be pregnant, is there any abortion clinics that any of u can recommend? I live in petaling jaya area and I'll be going back to singapore for another working experience of 2-3 weeks. I really hope that the forumers here can help me out as I feel very worried about missing my menstruation period. My boyfriend has tried calming me down ensuring me that the responsibility is on him and also says that me worrying more will cause my period to be delayed. But I really cannot get this problem off my mind even though what he say is true. :(